My Morning in 10 Seconds

1. Poked my eye with my mascara wand.
2. Watched as Hank (my oldest son's dog) snatched my muffin out of my hand on the way out the door.
3. Secretly laughed when the cocky new engineer guy dropped a million surface mount parts all over the floor.
4. Secretly lost my temper after my boss called and said she had to reschedule our meeting that I had prepared for all morning.
5. Missed out on the pizza party Joe's crew had so I could catch up on my work.
6. Laughed my butt off when Helen told Dave he missed a spot while shaving. Dave replied that he was growing a goatee.
7. Listened as Karen aka 'Barkey' told my new people all about how I got the nick name 'Lipgloss'.
8. Nearly sent an asthmatic to the ER because of my body lotion. (How's that for an ego boost!)
9. Became irritated with the truck driver who dropped off the janitorial supplies. When I seen him standing, I asked him if he needed his truck bill signed and held out my hand. He told me that Audrey usually signed them, so I told him that I was the manager of the department and that I also knew how to sign my name on the line. He suddenly changed his arrogant tune.
10. Came to the conclusion that I am not asking Helen about her family anymore. She gives out way too much information.