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How was my day? Let me tell you....

Saturday, July 31, 2010

"It's only creepy when they tap me on the shoulder."

Just how is it that the skinniest of people are usually the ones who eat the most?

I would kill to be one of those people.

I look at a piece of cheesecake and I gain 10 lbs., 20 if I give it a whiff.

A skinny guy with an arm load of junk food and drinks remarked to me today, "I hope this is enough to get me to Detroit."

"I'm pretty sure that's enough. How many people are you traveling with?" I couldn't help but chuckle to myself as I said this. On the counter before me sat a fountain pop, a Brisk raspberry iced tea, 2 king sized peanut butter cup packages, a bag of popcorn, a bag of beef jerky, a Monster energy drink, a fruit pie, and a package of donuts.

"Just me and a dead lady."

"I don't think I want to know any more about this dead lady," WTF??? Did he really say dead lady?? I glanced back at the guy immediately in line behind Snack Food Guy. He is staring at me, with I'm certain the same 'deer in the headlights' I was giving him.

"Really, I am driving a hearse. I don't think she'll be eating much but she's an excellent listener." It is now Snack Food Guy's turn to chuckle. Glancing out into the parking lot, sure enough, I see a big black hearse parked next to pump 3.

"Holy crap! Thank God! I thought you were a murder or something!" The guy in line behind the Snack Food Guy is now cracking up.

I had no idea people in the funeral business were so funny.

Snack Food Guy literally had me in stitches as he joked and told stories about his business.


Anonymous Je said...

I used to be able to eat that way and not gain any weight. That's pretty much the only thing I miss about my teen years. :)

9:44 AM  
Anonymous Jessica said...

That's me in the previous comment. I guess I hit the Enter key while typing my name.

9:45 AM  

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