Hmmmm...... This explains a lot!
From a strictly mathematical viewpoint it goes something like this:
What Equals 100%? What does it mean to give MORE than 100%? Ever wonder
about those people who say they are giving more than 100%? We have all
been to those meetings where someone wants you to give over 100%. How
about achieving 103%? What equals 100% in life?
Here's a little mathematical formula that might help you answer these
questions:
If:
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
is represented as:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26.
Then:
H-A-R-D-W-O-R- K
8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%
and
K-N-O-W-L-E-D-G-E
11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96%
But,
A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E
1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100%
And,
B-U-L-L-S-H-I-T
2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20 = 103%
AND, look how far ass-kissing will take you.
A-S-S-K-I-S-S-I-N-G
1+19+19+11+9+19+19+9+14+7 = 118%
Therefore, one can conclude with mathematical certainty that:
While Hard work and Knowledge will get you close, and Attitude will get
you there, it's the Bullshit and Ass-kissing that will put you over the
top !!!!!!
What Equals 100%? What does it mean to give MORE than 100%? Ever wonder
about those people who say they are giving more than 100%? We have all
been to those meetings where someone wants you to give over 100%. How
about achieving 103%? What equals 100% in life?
Here's a little mathematical formula that might help you answer these
questions:
If:
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
is represented as:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26.
Then:
H-A-R-D-W-O-R- K
8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%
and
K-N-O-W-L-E-D-G-E
11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96%
But,
A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E
1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100%
And,
B-U-L-L-S-H-I-T
2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20 = 103%
AND, look how far ass-kissing will take you.
A-S-S-K-I-S-S-I-N-G
1+19+19+11+9+19+19+9+14+7 = 118%
Therefore, one can conclude with mathematical certainty that:
While Hard work and Knowledge will get you close, and Attitude will get
you there, it's the Bullshit and Ass-kissing that will put you over the
top !!!!!!
@ 1:51 PM
8 Comments:
This is funny! I saw this in a forward my friend sent to me, and it's sad to think that 'bullshit' and 'asskissing' will put you over the top. Isn't that so true though?
Ah, life. :)
LOLOL oh how true Sherri hehe.
Life just isn't fair sometimes!
Did I mention my math sucks?
I'm definitely going to need to refine my ways here at work. I don't do nearly enough ass kissing and bullshitting! LOL
I had an engineer tell me one time "If you can't dazzle them with knowledge, baffle them with bullshit". How scary is that?? LOL
You are waaaaaaaaay too pretty to have to resort to bullshit. All you need to do is smile, or show the dimples (bet you thought I was going to say show something else, lol) and you will be set. Of course, I think your knowledge and drive to succeed might just get you by without anything else.
I can be pretty charming at times too. :D
Who needs to bullshit when you have a smile and charm?? LOL
(and don't forget the caramel scented lip gloss)
LOL - That was awesome! I think the caramel-scented lip gloss is a nice stocking-stuffer. To bad it is after Christmas otherwise I would have dropped the hint to my mother to get me some! :-)
Post a Comment
<< Home