'Path to Leadership'

Rick H. was, again, leading our class today. I hate it when he's there. He always calls on me when I'm totally not prepared for it. I was even hiding behind Scott P. to possibly shield myself from his view. Didn't work. Scott leaned back, and there I was, totally visible. I always feel like such an idiot after I've spoken. I can feel my face turn red, and I just know I sound like an idiot. It's so unfair. If I'm explaining a process, or giving a presentation, I'm always so good at it. But when it comes down to giving my opinion or my view on something, I freeze right up.

Much more horrible. In next weeks class, Rick is going to be playing 'devil's advocate' and reputing our arguments for our good/great leaders and our bad leaders. I'm HORRIBLE at that kind of stuff. I hate confrontations! This is going to suck! And, he researches everything.

Paxil

Devil brows was telling me today about his previous job, before this place. He worked at Unipro in Vanderbilt. Apparently is was absolutely horrible there. The worst working conditions I've ever heard of. I'm sure there are more horrible sweat shops out there then Unipro, but I was just horrified at what I heard.

• Offices with air conditioning blowing the hot air into the shop and cool air into the offices.
• Entire work forces taking a 20% pay cut.
• Being written up for leaving company property to purchase ice cream cones.
• Being asked if you want to keep your job because you have reported that improper practices are taking place in the work process.
• Needing to seek psychiatric help because of work related stress.

Misc. Crap

I'm depressed today. I feel overwhelmed.

I'm bummed that my jeep got smashed. I can't wait until it gets fixed. It looks ugly. The thing is, I shouldn't be so wrapped up in how ugly it is, I should be thankful that none of us were hurt. I had both of my kids with me, and we all were unharmed. He hit us going really fast. What bothers me most, is, I have a lot of money wrapped up in paying for that jeep, and I just hate the fact that this has happened.

I had someone from one of the production cells confront me today because "nobody told me that your posting was up". First of all, it's against company rules for me to solicit other employees to come to my line. Second of all, I don't want her to work for me anyway. I would have to go through the entire interview process and everything with her, and have to tell her that she was not qualified for my open rec. (Which, she truly is not qualified.) It's bad enought that I have 2 other candidates that I have to really tread lightly over. It's going to be a tough decision this time.

My audit is today. I am NOT looking forward to it. A half hour of intricate questioning about company infrastructure and the like. I just don't have the strength to deal with it this morning. It's end of month on top of it all. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaGH!!!!!!!!!!!!

I've got work up to my eyeballs to do. Not enough people to do it. And, I was just told by Bob that he has gotten the approval to scrap a bunch of stuff.

Big Ugly Hairy Spider

There is an extremely large and very hairy spider that has made my front deck his home. I'm creaped out just thinking about it. It's a spider on steroids, swear to God. It could probably bench press me if it wanted to.

Sherri and Her Gang of Thugs

That is what Joe has started to call us. (Me and my employees.)

Nathan K.

I was rear ended in front of Big Buck Brewery!! I'm so mad!! I was just sitting there, at a stand still, waiting for the car in front of me to turn, and, wham-o! I can't even recall actually knowing what had happened until way after it happened.

I sat there in a daze for about 5 seconds at least. My wipers were going, my blinker was on, and the only way I actually figured it out was because I looked in the rear view mirror and saw a truck sitting back there. Then it finally registered in my mind. I waited for the few cars to go by that needed to go by, and pulled into the chiropractic clinic. By then, I was upset. I got out of the jeep, and walked to the back. As I was headed back, the guy who smashed into me was hopping out of his truck and saying "Oh My God - I'm so sorry!" He was just repeating it over and over again. Of course, the only thing that popped out of my mouth was "I've got a 2 year old in here! Your damn lucky he's not hurt!" Then, he was feeling even worse.

I asked him how his truck was, and he said he thought it looked fine. I had gotten Thomas out by now, and the people in the house next door had walked over, they had heard the loud smash. The guy called the police department because neither Nathan nor I had our cell phones on us. The guy who was in the car in front of me ran across the street as soon as he checked in, he was on his way to work. Very nice guy, he walked over a couple of times to see if he needed to be a witness of the events or anything. A guy in a black truck, who never got out of his truck, ended up being the witness. I have no idea who it was. He sat in his truck the whole time.

As we were waiting for the police to arrive, oil just started pouring out of the truck. It was everywhere. Needless to say, he wasn't fortunate enough to 'drive' away from the accident. He must have hit me doing about 30 miles an hour, easily. I didn't even hear the brakes squeal. Zach said they did for a brief second.

So, as you've pretty much guessed, I didn't get ticketed for the accident. I was not at fault. He took my information, and took pity on me because of my kids, and let me go first. It was soooooo hot out there. I thought I was going to melt. I knew who the guy was before I even introduced myself to him. Charlie had pointed him out to me before. So, I told him my name, and he told me his. Then I said "I believe you know my husband. It's Charlie." His whole face just dropped. "Oh, No Way!! Oh Man!!" He repeated that a couple of times. "Oh, I owe him big time!" So by now, he was feeling pretty much as terrible as he could feel. Fortunately, after the initial shock of everything had worn off, my usual personality had come back. I was understanding of the fact that it was an accident.

Thank God we were all wearing seat belts. I don't always make sure we have them on! I will be from now on, that's for sure.

My neck is starting to hurt. I think I'm going to just go lie down for a while.

Rainbows

Ok. It's official. The SQE showed up for work today wearing a rainbow necklace.

Sun Spots

The stifling heat has sucked every last ounce of energy from me. I feel as though I'm traveling in slow motion as I continue on with my daily duties. My mind has become hazy, intense concentration is needed to do the simplest of tasks.

Name________________ (what was my name again??) :)

The dock door opens to let a truck unload his cargo. I can vividly see the heat lines rising from the paved surface outside. I'm in hell, and there's no escape!

UGH!!

What a day. I want to go home and start over.

I'm so sick and tired of petty crap. I want to just scream. Below, email from one of my employees......


Hi Sherri
I know you probably can do nothing, but I have to tell you that if Anna puts in for the Job back here and gets it I will have to move on and out of the building. Sorry

Mary Hoffman

Deb is wearing shorts today. Made me laugh. Considering, in last weeks production managers meeting, the comment was made about shorts. Tracy looked at me, and I replied back "That's right. I wear shorts all the time, and I'll keep right on doing it too. I would rather wear shorts to work then be sick from the heat." Rick B. piped up and said 'exactly' or something similar. I went on to say "They can tell me not to wear them, but, until they do, I'm going to keep right on doing it." That's when Deb said she didn't think anyone would say a thing. And, I agreed to her comment.

That's the thing with those guys. They have themselves set up in their minds that they are the deciding factor in everything. One of them gets the idea we should not wear shorts, so, they decide to just make it a rule that everyone should follow. Bullshit! I'll stand up for myself. My boss is the person who makes the rules for me, and until the rules change, I'm going to wear shorts if I feel like it. Funny, though, after I defended my right to dress as I pleased, the other production managers suddenly feel that it is ok to wear shorts again.

'The Lovely Bones' by Alice Sebold

I loved this book, and feel it is worth mentioning to others. I am copying the excerpt from my profile below. (I will be replacing the excerpt in my profile with a different excerpt from the book I am now currently reading.) It's not a suspense thriller, nor is it a really gory detailed version of a girls death. It is written from a girls perspective as she looks down from Heaven to her friends, family, and killer.

Currently reading - 'The Lovely Bones' by Alice Sebold "My name was Salmon, like the fish; first name, Susie. I was fourteen when I was murdered on December 6, 1973. In newspaper photos of missing girls from the seventies, most looked like me: white girls with mousy brown hair. This was before kids of all races and genders started appearing on milk cartons or in the daily mail. It was still back when people believed things like that didn't happen."

$8000 to install drapes???

I can't believe that the American people had to pay to have drapes installed over scantily clad statues in the Great Hall. For God's sake! The elderly are living in poverty with inadequate medical coverage, the schools are so underfunded children are not getting the education they need to compete in this world by today's standards, huge corporations are going bankrupt and millions of people are losing their jobs, and we are paying 8 grand to put drapes on a couple of statues! There is just something very wrong with our society today. I hate to say it, but when it becomes much more important that a naked statue be covered then an elderly person having enough money to buy food (and I don't mean cat food) our nation as a whole has failed.

Oh My God!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I just heard Becky tell the receiving girls "I've already been in Jail once, I don't want to do that again.......Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha"

Yikes!!

Ron's Good Side

Somehow, in the whole process of things, I've made it onto Ron's good list. Don't ask me how, I will never be able to tell you. It's just happened. I knew today when, at the point I entered the superior room, he said to me "You have a gift for words." I was a little taken aback, and said, I do? In his usual typical way he said "Yah. I was responding back to Beth's email when I noticed yours. Let's just say, I wasn't being nice. By the way, why in the hell would she have anything to do with receiving tags at all??" I just laughed and said if there is a process in this plant, she feels the need to be involved in everything about it, whether it involves her or not. He just laughed.

I know I didn't mention this previously, but I zinged him on Tuesday. He was in the receiving department and wanted the girls to see the new tags. Audrey called me over, I took a look, and he said 'what do you think. Acceptable?' So, with a totally straight face, I looked up at him and said 'absolutely not. We can't use this.' If I could have gotten a picture of his face, it was absolute and utter jaw dropping shock. Mary and Audrey knew what I was doing, so we all started laughing in unison. Then, of course, he caught on, and laughed a bit too.

I have to say, I will always be intimidated by the guy. He is an absolute and utter jerk when it comes to stuff. No people skills what so ever. So I know when he is saying he wasn't being nice, he was probably sending an emotionally crippling email to Beth.

* * *

above stated email copied below


Beth,
The po number has since been added back by Ron.
Sherri
-----Original Message-----
From: Beth Ross
Sent: Thursday, June 23, 2005 3:48 PM
To: Rick Brown
Cc: Sherri Sanders; David Alexander; Ron Hartman
Subject: receiving tickets
Hello Rick,
I have been advised that the PO number has been removed from the receiving label. Maybe whomever did this really did not know how important it is to have the PO number on the receiving tag. This is very important for purchasing for several reasons, but most information tractability and QA uses this information as will. Please get this added to the labels again.
Thanks,
Beth Ross

8th Grade Bad Mitten Champs

While in Wal Mart today, I happened across one of those 3 in one game sets. And, of course, the first thing I think about when I see the bad mitten rackets is Jessica and I playing Brian McVannel and Joe Smith during the bad mitten tournaments in 8th grade. We beat them ruthlessly. Then beat them again playing with our left hands. Brian had gotten so mad. We even got our pictures in the showcase. I laughed, and Zach asked me what I was laughing about, so I had to tell him about how Jessica and I had been the champs. He just smiled. Then said "you were in the same class as Jessica?" I was like, of course, that was my best friend in the world.

So, I bought the game set, and swore like a sailor during the entire set up process, then played bad mitten with Zach until my arm was threatening to fall off.

100 Grand

This is just plain terrible. I actually feel for the woman in this article. I'll bet she's strapped for money on top of it all.

The New Woman in Charge

I have to admit, I was worried when I found out Carrie would be taking over for Tracy. But, I now see that I was worried over nothing. She seems very confident and perfectly able to handle things. Plus, she is a whole lot friendlier then I ever even thought she was. Looks are very deceiving. She totally looks tough as nails.

Yea!!!

I got my authorization for a 3rd person. :)

Rick H. had his meeting back here. It went well. Dave spoke up and told Sandy and Rick that we have been doing a good job training him. I was happy to hear that. I said that we try our best, and will teach him as much as we can without 'brutalizing' him too much. It was funny, everyone laughed.

Mary and Audrey were able to get some stuff off their chests. I do have to say, I was starting to cringe when they first started to speak. I get embarrassed for them. Somehow, I have to get over that. They're not embarrassed in the least, why should I be.

Mustache Wax and Red Arrows

The new quality tech that was hired for 2nd shift has a mustache. And, several visible tattoos. Why do I think this is odd, you may ask? It is because her name is Becky. Yes, that's right, we have a bearded woman in our midst. She's nice enough, and has a good personality, but it just creeps me out.

Rick H. told everyone in the production managers meeting that I did an outstanding job turning around the receiving and receiving inspection areas. I was immediately wishing he hadn't sad a thing. That statement lumped me into the 'select few'. I hate that. Then, to top it off, he pulled me aside in the front isle to ask me how everyone was doing and offered to have a little meeting with the areas. Of course, everyone seen and was openly staring. I was pretty sure I had put that stuff behind me. A lot of people carried a portion of animosity toward me out of feelings of jealousy. I'm happy to be acknowledged for doing a good job, I guess it comes with mixed feelings.

Harassment

My mother has threatened me. She sent me a letter stating that she would be making my life 10 times harder, and that I was a trashy bitch. She made sure to write it all over the outside of the envelope as well, and then cover the words with clear tape so they would forever be visible to anyone who handled the mail. She threatened to tell my kids about Charlie. This just proves my point that she's a crazy woman. On one portion of the letter it says that I was forced to get married. Yah, right. 8 years after I had my baby "out of wed look" I was suddenly forced to get married. (Yes, the 'look' was intentional. That is exactly how she spelled it.) She also told me I needed to "clean up my own back yard". I'm actually not certain how I should handle this, or if I should do anything at all. I'm leaning toward the 'not do anything at all' scenario. That's what would make her angriest.

I am extremely concerned about my children's welfare though. I truly believe she is crazy, and would do crazy things. I can totally see her kidnapping them. Or, breaking into my house to sabotage it. I know first hand what she was like when I was a kid. She used to beat the crap out of me. I still get nose bleeds for no reason what so ever. She hit me in the nose so hard one time it's never been the same since.

The one thing that stands out in my mind most is just how terrible she used to make me feel about myself. Her biggest thing was that I was fat. God forbid. I weighed 145 lbs back then. I would give anything to weight that much now. She would make such a big deal out of it. And, when it came to sex, she has totally destroyed any concept of sex as being 'normal'. To this day, I feel like I'm committing the worst crime in the world. The first and only school dance I ever went to was when I was in the 7th grade. When I got home, I had to let her inspect my underwear to make sure I hadn't been with a boy. A school dance is just not worth the humiliation.

I guess I've come to accept the fact, over the years, that my mother truly hates me. She's jealous to the very core of her being at the things that I have accomplished. New car. New house. Decent job. 2 really good kids. I'm still young. It just about kills her with the whole Charlie situation.

'Whatever'

Ron H. just told Rick H. whatever in the material control meeting. And then he brushed his hand back, like he was blowing him off. It was too funny. Rick was totally embarrassed. He even commented "Ahhhh......Ron.......Gotta love him" Rick had just made the comment 'I said it before, I'll say it again, the electronics industry is doomed to fail'.

Speaking of Rick H. I think he was sleeping in his office. When he came into the superior room, his eyes were awfully red and he looked awfully sleepy. Just a side note: I'm not all that crazy about his hair cut.

On another subject: The company has totally cheaped out on the toilet paper and paper towels. They suck. The minute they get the least bit moist, they start to disintegrate.

Jamie

Kathy gave me the scoop on Amanda's boyfriend this morning. It's even worse then I thought. I thought it was inappropriate that he was staying with them to begin with, but now I know why. He is 28 years old, and already trying for disability. That's right, disability. Apparently, he and an uncle were driving down the road at about 90 miles an hour when they crashed. He was thrown from the vehicle, and suffered severe head trauma. He was in a coma for 3 months, and when he awoke, he had to relearn everything from scratch. In that time, he became addicted to pain killers, which caused him to have a seizure disorder. The seizure disorder rendering him disabled. So, now we have a 28 year old man who does not have a job and can not have a job to earn money because he is trying for disability. It's absolutely crazy. I can't imaging that Kathy being happy about this situation.

I know I've seen him before. And, he knew my name too. I just can't place it.

The Longest Day

Today has absolutely been the longest day of my life. Waiting for me in my email was 207 new memo's to be reviewed. 6 meeting notices all scheduled for today, most of which had been rescheduled from last week because I was not here. Everyone and their brother filling me in on all of the happenings from the week before. Plus, I had a cart full of components that required inspection.

I haven't even had time to read Dilbert today. :(

I can't wait to go home. Between the 9 million and one conversations I've had today and all of the stuff that I need to get done and the meetings, I'm overwhelmed. I just hope to God that Sandy is able to talk Rick H. into getting a 3rd person back here to help. She gets back tomorrow from her vacation, I'll find out then.

Neighbors, 2 doors down

The people who live 2 houses down from my brother have piqued my interest enough that I have to write about them. I only met them once, so most of what I'm about to say is the information that I received from my brother.

From the outside of the trailer, you would think it was uninhabited. Grass not mowed. Clutter laying about. Old cars and boats scattered across the yard. Looks are oh-so deceiving. Inside the trailer live a 61 year old man and a 19 year old woman. That's right. A man that is almost old enough to collect social security benefits and a girl still not old enough to drink legally. Yes, they are a couple. It's a sin, actually, the way this girl has to live. No electricity. A home that is basically unlivable, with the exception of the bedroom. And, good God, I can't imagine having sex with someone like that disgusting old man. It makes my skin crawl just thinking about it.

Neither of them work. They haven't for quite some time now. What they do with their time all day just escapes me. It has got to be a boring existence. And, the girl has little sores all over. Looking at her made me want to just throw her in the shower. She had the look of someone who is unclean. I can't remember her name anymore. It started with an 'S'.

How did this come to be, you may be asking. They met on the internet. She was from Pennsylvania. When she was 17 she left home to live with this man, and has lived with him ever since. For the life of me, I can't imagine ever wanting to put myself in a situation like that. I would be doing something to fix it, that's for damn sure.

1. get a job!
2. get a better house!
3. take a shower!
4. if it truly was love, I would expect this man to be making sure my needs were met daily. In this case, I think he has fallen down on his responsibilities.

Finally Home

Thank God.

On rubberband legs, I pull myself from my mother's car. I've sat almost continuously for the past 16 hours. I breath deeply from the fresh air outside the car. My lungs almost ache from it's purity. Inside the car, it's been a constant onslaught of second hand cigarette smoke and exhaust fumes from the minute we left my brother's driveway. I casually brush the ashes from my legs when I notice them. Somewhere along the way, my mother's ash tray that she kept precariously perched on her dash board had vibrated off the dash and landed on the floor. Most of it, anyway. Part of it blown all over my by the blast of air coming from my mother's wide open window. Too miserable to say a word, I look away in disgust.

Several times during this brief trip I've had to look away from my mother in disgust. It's still baffling to me, however, that she does not know just how disgusting she really is. Such a drama queen, she will make things up if she doesn't have anything interesting to capture everyone's attention with. Heat stroke on the way down, puking on the side of the road as we try to shop, fainting spells in the Wal Mart restroom, peeing her pants in my brother's living room. The one thing that just makes my skin crawl, after she supposedly peed her pants, she left her shorts and underwear hanging in the hall from my brother's vacuum cleaner, underwear on top, for the world to see just what a sick pig she really is.

I can't believe that I came from this woman.

I'm standing outside the car, with my belongings, clutching my cell phone. My mother is pissed right off at me, and I have no idea what I did. I just stand there, hoping that my ride will get there soon. She has decided that she will not be driving any farther with me in the car. For that, I am dearly thankful. I hear the deafening roar of her car coming to life. I glance up from the spot on the pavement that I have been staring at for the past few minutes in quiet reflection. She backs up and peals out of the parking lot as fast as she can get that car to go. Tiny stones and specks of debris hit the exposed flesh of my legs and arms. The skin starts to sting, and I look around behind me for my ride. I see him coming, he's still down the road a ways, but he's there.

Thank God.

Hotter then Hell

It is so hot down here I could absolutely die. In fact, at one point, I think I wanted to die. (I know, I shouldn't be joking about that like I am.)

Of course, the trip down here was absolutely the most miserable experience of my entire life. No air conditioning!! I wanted to kill my mother before I even left Michigan. It's impossible for her to sit in silence. She just has to be making a noise of some kind. Burping, coughing, sneezing, telling the most ridiculous shit to me that I don't even care to know. For instance, I now know, according to my mother, that my dad has his nipples pierced. I'm absolutely horrified by the thought. The more time I spend with her, the more disgusting I think she is.

And, of course, nobody has any money. I haven't been free flowing with mine, either, and I think that is making her mad as well. Today she announced that she is returning the outfit she bought for the funeral so she will have gas money to get back home on. She just makes me want to choke her. Seriously. If you could see her, you would believe me.

She has also been on this kick about getting as much attention as she possibly can. She announced last night to the world that she pissed her pants. Again, I still want to choke her.

Bobby is doing ok. I think it's because I'm here. When he first saw me yesterday, he gave me a hug, told me he was so happy I came down, and just stood there hugging me for like 10 minutes. I felt so bad for him. Susan did not die quickly. She died of internal injuries. Bobby seems to believe that she felt a lot of pain before she passed. In his opinion, her lip was pouted out, and that said everything to him. He identified her body at the morgue, and when he seen her, she was in very bad condition. Her head had been impacted by the side of the car. (incidentally, it was her side of the car that the motor home collided with.) One of her teeth were broke off. Severe bruising. Naturally, she was soaked in her own blood. For the life of me, I can't understand why, but Bobby has decided to put her blood soaked clothing in the freezer. Must be a part of his grieving process.

Her family was totally hick. The minute we got there, the dad said he wanted Susan's stuff. Like a vulture. He went through everything. He even wanted her clothing. It disgusted me. To some people, the only thing they see is a dollar sign. I have to say, my family is definitely just as bad as hers.

I'm so homesick. I wanted to go back home yesterday before I even seen my brother. Zach is a wreck. He's cried to me on the phone several times now. He misses me. Charlie is worried that I'm going to be taken advantage of. I just hope things work out ok.

Well, I'm in the library at Bronson, waiting for them to come pick me back up, so, I'd better go. I have so much more to say, it's hard to tear myself away. I'll just have to save it for another day.

Red Arrow

It's been quite the morning already. If I could, I would go home in a heart beat.

First thing this morning, Elizabeth is all crabby and bitchy toward me. I ignored her. I'm not in the mood for her ridiculous bull shit. I can't help it if she thinks she is better then she is, and not recognized enough for her importance.

I then talk to Rick B. He claimed that the 'necessary' components that were coming in on Saturday did not get received because, after speaking with Bob, he discovered they weren't as necessary as he thought. Don't ask me, I don't have a clue. I just know that Bob came back all in a 'rush' Friday wanting to make sure they got received.

Two of Joe's people went to Rick H. because they supposedly didn't have enough work to keep them busy. One of them was loaned to me after the UPS truck got here. Made Joe look like an ass, and, Rick was not happy about it. Mark was definitely stressing, Rick must not be in a good mood today.

Audrey was on a kick about a component that went through inspection and it ended up being received incorrectly. She made a big finger pointing deal out of it. So, I go and look, and the only reason why it passed through inspection was to check for RoHS compliance. After Mary was gone, I spoke with her about finger pointing, again. I told her it was unnecessary and I did not want to see it happening. That is something that will irritate me every time. Mistakes are made, don't think for a second that it won't happen to you. In fact, this was her issue. She received incorrectly, and I only checked for RoHS. I did not do a BOM/AML comparison. She was just about to cry, but I smoothed it over a bit. Same point was put across, but, I lessoned the severity.

The new SQE came back to tell me that Paul Heister was complaining about the prox probes being in the wrong location. Don't know what the heck Paul was looking at, but they were in the correct non net location. They should really think about laying off the crack down there. :)

So, here I am. I'm watching Elizabeth sulk over there while inspecting the prox probes. She made a comment about my inspection cart getting loaded up, and I just told her oh well, I'm not swapping out the cart. I then snapped at Mary about keeping it neater. There's tons of room. I wish people would just quit being bitchy and lazy. I can't take it all the time. Sooner or later, I snap.

I'm Bored

I'm bored. So bored, in fact, that I've spent the last half hour taking stupid internet quizzes on 'if I were a color, what color would I be.......' etc. Incidentally, I was a green.

Friday at work Bob came back to tell me about 3 parts that were being shipped Saturday delivery, UPS. He wanted to make sure they got received and processed for the AI build. I stood and talked to him for about a half hour, just basic things about the visit, about who was taking Sandy's job, just little things. In the conversation, we of course ended up talking about the total fiasco that happened during my presentation. He kept saying "You wouldn't look at me, I was trying to point to the AQL sheet" and "I elbowed Rick and told him to save you" and "I knew you were just nervous". As much as I hate to admit it, it sounded to me like he was being genuine, and did want to see me succeed. I hate myself for this, but, I'm going to let my guard down, just a little. I also noticed one other thing.

All of the stuff that I have been thinking and imagining and speculating about the new SQE are totally off the mark. I no longer think he hates me. Don't get me wrong, I still believe he may be gay. But, I don't think he hates me. I think he may be jealous of me though. And not for the reasons that I initially thought. While I was talking to Bob, the SQE was on the other side of the table from us, and, not once was he acknowledged by Bob. We stood and talked and I didn't even notice a thing. Then, when Bob looked and seen that we were inspecting the prox probes again, he asked if that was the new supplier. I said yes, showed him one of the defective components, and it immediately hit me. I looked over at Dave, and I totally knew. He was intentionally left out by the both of us. We were discussing an issue that was totally his issue. So, I said to Dave, "Dave, you know more about this than I do, why don't you fill Bob in on the issue." That's all it took. He was given his dignity back. That was all that he really ever needed. After that, he was a chatterbox working with us. He mentioned how our area was the only place he really got any training. I felt bad. He was intimidated by me, so much so that he avoided me. Not because I'm horrible, or, an idiot. But, because of the knowledge and respect I have earned from my fellow coworkers. When he is with me, he feels like a sidekick of sorts. People tend to just ignore the fact that he is there.

I have decided, I will no longer let this happen. I will make a conscious effort to include him in on the conversations that I have as long as he happens to be working an issue with me. I will not exclude him out of habit. (Habit picked up from working with Bob.)

Your Hot.....

Ok. So, I'm totally embarrassed. I was walking past John N. today, he was in the center isle looking up at Jack and the heating and cooling guy. His face was read and sweaty, he was wiping the sweat from his forehead with the back of his hand. I said to him "You look hot John." Meaning, he looked overheated. He says back to me "Thanks!" and smiles. I thought I was going to die. So, I clarified and said he looked overheated, and we laughed for a second. What I couldn't help but think about was when he wanted to go out with me. About 7 years ago he had wanted to go out with me, and it had gone so far as Audrey C. talking to me one day in the back of the warehouse in the AI section. She had asked me what I thought of him, and, if I would go out with him. I had to tell her no, of course. So, after that, he avoided me at all cost for the longest time. Over the years, thought, he's gotten over it, I think. He's not so mean to me anymore. And, he jokes around with me once in a while too. Plus, he's gotten married and has a baby now.

Class is Dismissed

I'm not sure if I should feel privileged or what. Class was canceled yesterday because of the AI debacle, so Joe let me know as soon as he found out. Not a big deal, he sits right on the other side of the cubicle wall from me. About 20 minutes later, Ed came walking back to let me know the same information. Ed works in the bull pen, which is on the other end of the building. I just found out that Scott came back yesterday as well, but I had already left. He also was going to fill me in on the fact that class was canceled. Scott also works in the bull pen. I'm just glad I didn't sit here until 4:00 only to realize when nobody showed up that they weren't having class.

The AI run is not going well at all. It's a nightmare. I've never seem Jim so drenched in sweat. Rick has pretty much stood vigil outside the elk line with his arms crossed for 2 days now. Bob looks like he's absolutely been wrung through the ringer. We have hired a plane to fly Bob and as many boards as we can to Dublin Ohio for AI. When I last heard, we had around 60-70 boards through test. The order is for 100.

Tick... Tick... Tick.... (Time is running out.)

Dilbert

I love reading Dilbert. It's just too funny that most of the stuff that happens in that comic has mirrored, on more then one occasion, the things that happen right here where I work.

For instance, haven't we all had a boss just like the pointy haired boss?? LOL!

The Paper Ball War

The enemy troop has engaged in a full on attack. Paper balls litter the area around me. I am pressed flat to the cubicle wall, eyes fixed on the razor wire strung along the perimeter. In the distance I hear the subtle crinkling of yet another paper ball in the process of assembling.

Now is my chance!! In the blink of an eye, I reach down, grab as many paper balls as my baby hands can grasp, and begin chucking them over the cubicle wall. I've hit my target, cries of agony are released to the world. He has retreated to fight again another day.

I have won the battle, for today.

I think I know why......

The new SQE does not like me because he is gay. I'm almost positive of it. He avoids me at all cost. I get male attention, and he doesn't.

Immigration Policy

This is the most bizarre thing I have ever seen. Now, tell me this, if you don't want to be caught sneaking in to the United States border, why in the heck would you fix up a taxi to cross the Florida Straits? I also think our immigration policy sucks. If they don't belong here, they don't belong here. Whether on land, or on water.

(I am unable to figure out how to link a news article. So, until I do figure it out, I'll just tell you.)

* * * * * *

I Figured it out!! Yea!!

My Little Brother

My brother turns 29 today. I've been thinking about it for 2 days now. I remember like it was only yesterday my own 29th birthday. He called me a couple of days after my birthday, and didn't even once mention that he remembered my birthday. I didn't say a word. I know he is still living in Florida, but, I have no idea how to even get in contact with him. No address, no phone number, not even a job name.

It still amazes me sometimes just how little I have to do with my own family. We go for years without seeing each other. And, I prefer it that way. Sad but true.

"Golf Course Catheter"

This has got to be the most disgusting thing I have ever heard, but it was so funny it brought tears to my eyes when Jim was talking about it.

The conversation in the production managers meeting had turned to Golf. Deb had been invited by the Lang vending machines guy to participate in a women's league he was starting. So, she said this time, she wasn't going to be doing any drinking because she didn't know where the bathrooms were, and, she wasn't going to do a repeat episode of what happened last time. It was left for us to laugh and insinuate that she had relieved herself in the woods on the course. So, that's when Jim announced his brilliant invention that was going to make millions.

"Golf Course Catheter - Not just for the hospitalized anymore!"

I thought I was going to die laughing. Tears literally streamed out of my eyes. I even said aloud "that's so gross". That just made us laugh harder. It sparked Jim to describe to us different scenario's involving the necessity of his new invention. "No more peeing in the pool. No more frantic expressway moments. Imagine the savings on the water bill..............."

I'm going to be industrious today!

So, this will be my only work hour entry today. And, let me tell you, it's already shaping up to be quite a day.

Rick H. told me this morning that all broker parts will now be routed through receiving inspection. That's a ton of material. I don't have enough support to be able to handle it.

I have 5 meetings to go to today. All of which I know will end up with me coming out of them with actions. I can sometimes just scream. My brain wants to just freeze up from over use.

The receiving area internal audit starts today. My first audit since taking over the area. I have a complete belief that it is not going to go well because those guys are absolutely clueless when it comes to audit etiquette. They will undoubtedly point out every single flaw and uncertainty that exists. I also believe that they will break as many of the rules as possible.

I can't stand fake personalities today. I want to just claw their eyes out. I already told one person that I wasn't interested in the conversation they were about to have with me, and that I was too busy to waste my time with it. Surprisingly, she thought it was funny, and laughed, and said she would talk to me later. I was serious as a heart attack when I said it. I wanted for her to get mad at me. It never works. I'm not sure why.

Mary just came over to tell me that she and Audrey aren't getting along well. Great.....now I have to babysit two feuding hormonal women. What's worse? They are my receivers!!


AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!! (That's me screaming.)

Send us your poor, your weak, your huddled masses..........

Elizabeth is feeding me again! She brought me in a meat loaf sandwich with sauteed peppers on it. It was scrumptious!! She said she wasn't happy with what I was doing. She doesn't like the fact that I am watching my weight. She did this before, she will continue to bring me food a couple of times a week until she is satisfied that I am eating like I should be. (Her standards of eating anyway.) I'm not going without food, I always bring a tv dinner for lunch. Not good enough for her though. Maybe it's because she is 73.

Here I am again..........

Ok, so, here I am again. I should be working, and I'm typing in my blog. The very interesting thing is, the reason why I am typing in my blog is to talk about the quiz I just took about job satisfaction. I scored a 'Why in the heck are you still working there?!?' It was very funny. Several of the questions asked were about how much time of the day do you spend doing personal things, how often you arrive at work late, do you often spend time on non work related conversations. All I can say is, I am definitely guilty of all of the above. (I should hang my head in shame.)

Taken Seriously

I often wonder if a woman is taken seriously in the presence of an entire male work force. For instance, earlier today during the walk through. I caught one guy checking me out. Literally from head to toe, he looked me up and down. So, of course I put that out of my mind at that particular moment, I had to pretend I didn't see a thing and continue on with my presentation. As I sat here and started to get back to work, it crossed my mind again. And, I began to wonder, did this guy see me as an equal, or, someone who got her job by looking cute and being friendly.

I have a feeling the new SQE may be of that impression.

Applied Innovations

Well, that didn't go very smoothly. They just did the customer walk through, and I was totally tongue tied. I somehow managed to muddle my way through the visit. I'm embarrassed. I try so hard to be flawless, and usually do a good job. Deep down inside, I wish that they would just skip this area all together. Then again, deep down inside, if they did skip the area all together, I would wonder why they skipped the area all together. Catch 22.

Side Note: They always skip materials when they do a walk through. Rick stands at the door, points it out quickly, gives a brief explanation of what it's for, and goes right on to inspection. Back in the day, it was quite the opposite. Inspection was always bypassed, and materials would have gone through a thorough explanation of all the processes.


Tracy H. has put in her notice. Her last day is June 23rd. Everyone was in shock. She is moving to Mt. Pleasant, and is absolutely taking a risk. No job, no house, no family. I personally think it's because Troy might be trying to get custody of Danny again. I have no evidence of this, just a gut feel.


Today was to be Zachary's first day staying home alone. In fact, at this very moment, Charlie thinks Zach is at home by himself. Well, he's not. Even though Charlie told me not to give in and take Zach to daycare, I did anyway. I couldn't just leave him there, crying his eyes out on the couch. He was scared. I'm going to lie to Charlie and tell him that the phones were out (which is an actual reality, but, they weren't out this morning when I took him to Kathy's) and I couldn't leave him at home with no way of getting in touch with me. Just in case of emergency.

Purple Flower Moment?

I'm so mad at myself. I soaked a white shirt in bleach yesterday, and then filled the washer up to do a load. I forgot I had that shirt in there, and threw a bunch of color tops and a pair of jeans in there. I just looked in the washer to put the load in the dryer, and one of my light blue tops is bleached out to an ugly multi faceted purple color.

My eyes burned from the bleach smell as I looked in the washer, horrified at what I saw. One of my very cute summer tops was bleached to a tye dyed purple monstrosity. I look away in disbelief, I'm certain when I look back things will be normal, that it was all just a game my eyes were playing on me. I look back, nothing has changed. I'm scanning my memory, trying to understand why this had happened. Then, peeking out from underneath, I see it. The white top I had soaked in bleach the day before. I had dumped the top, bleach water and all into the washer to start a load of whites. I am suddenly overtaken with fear as I tear the remaining items out of the washer. I had filled the washer with a load of colors. I painstakingly search each item for the damages I may have caused. A flood of relief washes over my entire body after the last garment has been searched. No damages have been found on any of the clothes, with the exception of the light blue - now purple - summer top.



I had the absolute strangest dream just before I woke up. I had a dream I was having an affair of some kind with Jim C. The portion of the dream that I do remember is the two of us were at a house of some kind, and I was putting my shoes on. I was asking Jim if he would help me with something, and, he looked at me with that devious smile he has, and he said he would help me with anything I wanted. We kissed, and I got into a vehicle with him, and we were then driving somewhere. Now, this is totally bizarre, when I opened the car to get in, in my dream I was opening a car door, and it was a refrigerator inside. I mean, a literal refrigerator with food and stuff. I slid a few jars out of my way and sat down.

I'm Going Insane

My God, I think I'm going mad. My kids are on my every last nerve. Right now, Zachary is singing "I met a big meany and his name was Thomas......" and Thomas is whining about drinking pop.

This is horrible to say, but sometimes, I feel like I could just walk out there and scream my fricking head off, and keep screaming until everyone runs and hides. Then, I would be sane again. I obviously don't do that, and end up about 5 seconds from insanity. That's when I get irritable, and I snap at everyone. Even Thomas.

I stained more of the porch today. My arm is absolutely throbbing, and I'm irritated that I'm the one that has to do that stuff. I feel it's a man's job, and if a man isn't man enough to take care of his duties, he's a loser.

Unusual Behavior

Bob M seems to be sticking up and defending me a lot lately. I find it a little unnerving. For instance, today in class, he was defending several of my answers to the process model for me. Plus, he's been very friendly lately. Has he decided to befriend me? I still have hard feelings toward him, and probably always will, for trying to fire me. I'm curious to see how this will play out. If it's one thing I've learned in my time there at work, nobody does anything without an ulterior motive.

Casper

It's official. I got my first white leg comment of the season. I hate the fact that I don't tan well at all. I hate it even more when people point it out to me that I'm not all that tan. Like, for some unknow reason, I might possibly not realize that I'm not very dark. I'm not blind. Next time I get a comment, I'm going to say "Thanks for pointing that out to me! Just think, all this time, I thought I was black."

Bad Headache

My head hurts so bad today I want to just die. I took 2 more tylenol just now. I hope they kick in soon

The guy at the drive through at McDonald's looked way too familiar to me. And, he was behaving like he totally had a crush on me or something. He was practically laying in the window so he could see me. It was way bizarre. He knew me from somewhere, and I knew him from somewhere. It just escapes me. I wish I could remember.

Because I'm thinking about it at this very moment, I'm going to mention it. I never know what to do when a guy touches my hand. Today, I was looking at a substrate, and asked the opinion of something from one of the component engineers who was outside my area. So, I had the particular dimension to be measured in my hand, and I was telling him my interpretation of the print, and asked if I was looking at it correctly, because, the dimension was not to print. He then agreed with me, that I was interpreting the print correctly, then he himself reaches down and starts to (sorry, I have no better way to put this, and my head hurts to bad to think about it) fiddle around with the stiffener too. (The dimension I was measuring was called a 'stiffener'.) I was still holding it in my hand, so our hands were touching. I don't know why I'm even thinking about this. Probably because my mind won't process intelligent thought. But anyway, the first thing I thought was, do I yank my hand back? Do I leave it there? Will he think I'm flirting with him if I leave it there? Will he be offended if I yank it back? I was in a quandary, and didn't know what in the heck to do. Of course, he had no idea I was even thinking about it, because, when you think about it, it's an absolutely ridiculous thing to worry about.

Which brings me to my next thought. Do you think that guy at McDonald's is thinking, I know that lady from somewhere........

Stirring the Pot

Judy B came down just before I left to specifically ask me how I was getting along with the new SQE. Apparently she had it all set up in her mind that we weren't getting along at all. And, that we had gotten into some kind of an altercation or something. At first, I was hurt by what she said. Then, I decided, consider the source.

Judy based her entire insinuation on this piece of a conversation she heard....

"Sherri said that?" Bob says, unbelieving.

"Yes, Sherri, the one down there" Dave says, pointing in the direction of the other end of the building.

Older then Dirt

Pat graduated with Dianna. He asked me today where Charlie's sisters were at. So, I told him. Then, I casually mentioned I would ask Dianna if she remembered him. He said, probably not, he only went the last 2 years of school in Gaylord. Now, I'm wondering if he was a nerd. Because, I'm pretty sure she was popular. If he were popular, she would definitely know who he was, they would have hung out in the same circle.

Dry Run

RH totally chewed Ron H. up today in the dry run. It was absolutely horrible. I felt pity for the man, to the point where I had to turn my eyes away from it as it was happening. From start to finish he was an absolute asshole to him. I couldn't believe my eyes and ears, to be quite literal. I didn't say a peep. Anyone who did was absolutely ground right down to nothing. It was unbelievable. At one point, RH said "I'm going to be a bastard about this" and he was true to his word, that's for sure.

To think, I almost missed the whole spectacle too. Pat came over after it had started to get me, he decided he felt it was necessary that I be there. I kind of wish he hadn't. Near the end, when RH had made it known he was not happy with what he had seen, we were nowhere close to what he had envisioned, and he was going to be telling Rick B. in no uncertain terms exactly what would be happening not just what Rick B. thought was necessary, he turned to me and very politely and nicely told me that he knew I was busy, and he was just going to take the next few minutes to "note changes" that would be taking place with what had been created. He was smiling too, on top of all that. He was taking pleasure in the fact that he had the ability to pummel someone like that. So, I told him that I was pretty busy with some MB stuff, and that if we did another run on any receiving changes could he let me know. I didn't know what else to do......I just wanted to get out of there. In his usual gesture, he put his hand on my shoulder and ensured me that the next time we got together for another go, I would be notified and it had "better be better then this". All I could think of was, thank God I didn't have anything to do with this! It turned out to be a disaster.

Shorts are Discouraged

That's the rule in our handbook here at work. Which, actually, is pretty much a waste of space. Consider it for a second. It doesn't actually tell you not to wear shorts. So, in actuality, it could say shorts are acceptable, and mean the exact same thing.

Yesterday I wore shorts to work for the first time. I was the first manager to actually wear shorts to work this year. Which, yesterday, Mark had made a reference in a meeting to the fact that 'shorts were discouraged'. Not a reference to say, Sherri, you shouldn't be wearing shorts to work. Just a reference to say, there are lots of things documented in specs and guides that are written but not exactly clearly defined or followed.

Today when I came in, I noticed 2 other production managers wearing shorts. (Pat on my back for being a trend setter.)

Roz

Just for a moment, it flashed across my mind the day that Roz had asked me to take on the responsibility of being the RMA planner. It was a very long time ago, but I just now realized something. At the time, I had been under the impression that she was trying to further me along in the company. She was my friend, and wanted to see my talents used for something other then receiving. But, I now realize, that wasn't the background behind it at all. She was threatened by me, and felt that if I stayed in the area, I may take it over. She had told me more then once, keep your friends close, your enemies even closer. I do believe, in a way, I was both to her. A friend, and rival in many ways.

Even though I now realize it was not done with good intentions behind it, I am still grateful that she made the switch. I would have ended up working for Tracy. That would have been probably the worst thing that could have ever happened to me. She would have held me down and suffocated the life right out of me. So, I am thankful to have gotten the opportunity I got from Roz. It was definitely a stepping stone in the right direction.

Devil Brows

The new SQE very much looks like a demon. His eyebrows all point up. And, they are half dark, and half grey, which is even worse. In a way, I'm freaked out by it.

I have also just noticed. He has a receding hairline, and it forms a downward triangle on his forehead. Very demonic!