GAS

As of right now, the gas price here in town is $3.52 a gallon, regular. This scares the heck out of me. When I went to work yesterday morning, it was $2.74 a gallon, regular.

10 Reasons why I need to stop shopping at Wal Mart

1. The stupid cashier who waited on me this morning with the Lee press on nails. (I don't want to have you 'electronically' print my check, I can write just fine. When I say I'm not interested, don't ask me again!)
2. I discovered that the 'fresh' bagels that are on display with the doughnuts come out of a Peppridge Farm bag. (I almost died this morning when I asked the girl if they had anymore bagels, and she grabbed the package off the display and opened it up.)
3. The grumpy door greeter who sits on the stool. (Ok, I know your like 100, but don't take it out on me!)
4. The pop in the coolers by the check out isle's is always warm!
5. It is inevitable, someone on a motorized cart always misses running me down my mere inches.
6. I found a package of moldy ham on the shelf this morning. (EW!)
7. It creeps me out that 2 or 3 people stand at a podium in the center of the store and watch the check out girls work. (What's even creepier, I've seen the Lee press on lady standing at that podium before.)
8. I am constantly harassed by the sample people to 'try our new product!'
9. It takes me 10 minutes to find the trash bags, only to discover they are out of the size I'm looking for.
10. There is just something wrong when you can buy a gun, eat at Subway, get your hair cut, eyes checked, nails manicured, and add minutes to your cell phone while you are waiting to have the tires replaced on your vehicle!

7 Things

A million thanks go to Angela for the 7 things list I'm about to complete! LOL

7 Things to do before I die:
1. Master the unholy vacuum cleaner.
2. Become a published author.
3. Grow a prize winning flower.
4. Stop biting my nails when I'm nervous.
5. Join the mile high club.
6. Finish reading 'Anna Karenina'. (Started reading it over a year ago!!)
7. Go on an ultra luxury vacation to somewhere tropical, sunny, and scenic.

7 Things I can do:
1. Think quickly under pressure.
2. Win a person over with my smile.
3. Crochet and knit.
4. Stick to a budget.
5. Drive a stick shift.
6. Make lasagna from scratch.
7. Keep up with fashions and style.

7 Things I can't do:
1. Be around my mom for more then an hour.
2. Make no bake cookies.
3. Ride in a glass elevator.
4. Change the fluorescent lights in my kitchen.
5. Use the bathroom where I work.
6. Whistle.
7. Back up in my driveway without driving on the grass.

7 Things that attract me to the opposite sex:
1. Personality.
2. A nice set of teeth.
3. Intelligence.
4. Kindness.
5. Wide shoulders.
6. Toes that aren't all gnarled.
7. Just enough body hair.

7 Things I say most often:
1. Oh My God!!!
2. Are you on crack?!?
3. What?!?
4. No comment.
5. I said no! (kids)
6. Like that's going to happen.
7. You must have me confused with someone who cares.

7 Celebrity crushes:
1. Johnny Depp
2. Pierce Brosnan
3. Tom Cruise (even though he's been acting like a jack ass, he's still cute)
4. Brad Pitt (before he went blond)
5. Orlando Bloom
6. Vince Vaughn
7. Owen Wilson

7 People I'd like to do this list:
(Wish I knew 7 people who haven't already done the list.)

1. Jessica
2. Trée
3. Midwest_Hick

My little guy, and my not so little guy. :) Zach's first day of 6th grade went great, I'm pleased to announce. His best friend from all through elementry school is in his class, and his best friend from last year is in his switch class.  

 

 

Production Managers Gone Wild

That was the prevailing theme to today's production manager's meeting. Yikes! What does that say for us! LOL

All in all, a very unproductive meeting today. We spent quite a bit of time discussing the wide world of extreme golfing. :) The tale of Rick and Tim barrel rolling their golf cart in a drunken stupor at Bay Harbor seemed to lock that in. Of course, Joe had to recount the tale of the woman's bare footprints and curious depressions in the sand trap he happened across. Yah, I'm sure he was down on all fours checking that out. Then there was Jim recounting the tale of bare chested golf in the inner city. Don't even ask!! Let's just say he ended up passed out on a green with a golf club bent in half at his side.

Jim is still stuck on the idea of producing our 'Production Managers Gone Wild' episode. The last thing in the world that I want to see is Rick's huge belly flopping around with Deb's bare chest. Ugh!! I bet we could make millions though, just on shock value! LOL

10 Sure Fire Signs Your Child is a Preteen

1. He asks you to "how do I look" before he leaves for school. (Gotta impress those girls you know!)
2. If you tell him he looks cute, he changes his outfit.
3. He spends more time in front of the mirror then you do.
4. It's no longer acceptable to give him a hug on the first day of school. (Aw......Mom!)
5. You no longer have to tell him to brush his teeth.
6. He is embarrassed to walk with you in the store.
7. Carrying a lunch to school is 'lame'.
8. The classic response to "what did you do in school today?" is "nothing"
9. It's next to impossible to walk from one side of his bedroom to the other without serious injury.
10. 3 main food groups - chips, pop, pizza

Today was Zach's first day of school. What a nightmare. I don't know if I'll be able to survive until adult hood!! :)

The Amazing Ruthie

Leave it to Ruthie to brighten the day! A good ending to a not so good day.

Ruthie (Doc Control Coordinator) had come back to the area to have me look over a work instruction that needed to be updated. She takes one look at Denise and says "Who the hell are you?" I just burst out laughing, I couldn't help it. Ruthie gets a big smile on her face. (Did I mention she's like 57?) So I introduce Ruthie and Denise and explain what Denise's position is in the plant and how she is just in training. That's when Ruthie noticed 'one' of Denise's tattoos. Ruthie grabs Denise's hand, yanks up her sleeve, and sees the sleeve of tattoos Denise's husband has artfully designed up her arm. (Denise's husband is a tattoo artist.) I though for sure she was going to have a heart attack. It was just so damn funny I couldn't help it. Tears were streaming down my cheeks. Denise was laughing as well. Then Ruthie happened to notice the nails. "How in the hell can you work in those things?" she says. Still laughing, Denise says she had at least an inch cut off before she started here. They were normally a lot longer. That's when Ruthie asked her if she went to church. Denise, of course, doesn't go to church. I just about died at Ruthie's response. She just blurted out "Those damn women at the Catholic church. They bless themselves with that baptismal water like it's holy water and babies pee in there." So, there I am, again laughing to the point of tears. We finally ended the conversation with her secret confession that her daughter Sarah has her nipples pierced. I didn't say a word, but Denise had told me earlier that she had hers done as well. A package deal. I didn't ask what the whole 'package' was, but I'm assuming 'nether region' was included in there. AAAGH!! (The only reason for the confession was to let me know that she was grateful that I didn't judge based on appearance. She had thought about not wearing the tongue ring and all the earrings, but she wanted to be herself.)

Home at Last

I've been trying to conserve on gas by not going home for lunch every day, but today I just had to get out of there. I just don't understand how people can live with themselves sometimes.

Today's meal......

Healthy Request frozen turkey and mashed potatoes. Very yummy, even if it is a TV dinner. (Real turkey to boot!)

I've been sitting here thinking about how all of my people are so visibly hostile toward the new tech. It's just bugging the hell out of me. I guess I just put myself in her position and think of how I would feel if it were happening to me. I'm definitely going to have a team meeting today before everyone leaves. I'll get her boss to come get her for a bit, and explain to him the situation I have going on. I was telling Joe about everything and he seems to think they may be experiencing jealousy that I'm taking the time to work with her one on one, there by taking away one on one time that I spend with all of them. I most notably notice it with Elizabeth. The minute Denise is out of the area she perches right on my desk and talks till the minute she gets back.

Note to self: Now that I have calmly thought about it, and rationalized a reason for the behavior, I'm going to have to make sure I get the one on one time with everyone just like normal. And fake nails with playboy bunnies airbrushed on them. LOL!!

A Glass Fish

I was pleasantly surprised this morning when Joe brought me back a souvenir from his family vacation. (They went to Kazmel) A glass fish with yellow and blue and orange inside it. Very cool, I have it on my desk right now. :) (Interestingly enough, they went to Mexico, and came back with a souvenir marked 'made in China'.)

I hate to say it, but this week is shaping up to be just as frustrating as last week. I get so irritated, and I just can't help it. I'm training the new quality tech for the next couple of days on inspection processes, and everyone just hates her. Not for anything she has done or said either. My employees are just plain mean and jealous. It's making me angry with them. Elizabeth is upset because she doesn't look professional. Too many earrings, tattoos, fake nails an inch long, and bleach blond hair. I was actually losing my patience hearing what Elizabeth was saying. So I asked her how appearance had anything to do with her capabilities. She said she just didn't like her. I had to walk away. I just couldn't listen anymore.

Now, I'm not saying that I like the look that she sports. It's really not my taste to have playboy bunnies airbrushed on my nails. But, as long as she's a good worker and does a good job, who cares what she looks like. Am I wrong?? Oh, I'll just be glad when things get back to normal!!

Winding Down

The weekend is coming to a close........ Sunday night is upon me already. Sigh......... Funny how the weekend just seems to fly right by.

Weekend/Work Day Conversion Chart

1 minute work day = 1 hour weekend time
1 hour work day = 1 day weekend time
1 work day = 1 week weekend time
1 work week = *yet to be determined. Nobody has ever had this much weekend time.

On a side note: I have finally taken the time to update my link list with a few more blogs of interest. Tree (I wish I could get your accent in there) love what your doing with your blog, and such a worthy cause. I've become addicted to your entries and comments. :) Madman, what can I say, can't wait to see what DG will do next. Bobby, I'm honored that you linked my blog! I linked yours as well.

10 things you can experience at the fair that you're likely not to experience anywhere else

1. Carnies. One in particular from last night comes to mind. She had no teeth, spit on my hand when she was talking to me, and had extremely long toes. (Toes?? You may be asking.......yes, she was working her ride with her bare feet kicked up. Ugh!)

2. Elephant ears. Nothing beats an elephant ear! Yum!

3. A pageant queen who can show up wearing a flannel shirt and jeans. It's perfectly acceptable when you're the Fair Queen.

4. The main attraction? Why, the demolition derby of course!! Don't know what it is about grown men smashing into each other at the fair that I find so fascinating.

5. Only at the fair can you have a 45 minute conversation with a complete stranger about a tractor.

6. Watching your child's face light up as he pets the animals. (Thomas had a moment worth remembering last night. He had grabbed a goats leash, tugged a bit, and said 'Look at me!!' So cute!)

7. Getting your picture taken with your head sticking out of hole in a piece of wood that has the body of an old man and woman painted on it. (From the famous picture with the guy holding the pitchfork in front of the farm house.)

8. 4-H exhibits. This years favorite, the butterfly/moth exhibit.

9. The smell of livestock. Yuck!

10. Watch a man carve an angel out of a tree with a chainsaw.

County Fair

Where else can a girl go to get the word 'Saturday' stamped on one hand, and a tractor stamped on the other? :)

Interesting true fact: On my first date with my husband we went to the fair. I threw up all over myself. He still wanted to go out with me on a second date anyway.

Saturday Mornings

I absolutely live for Saturday mornings. Absolutely the best part of the week. The realization that you have 2 whole days ahead of you before you have to go back to work is golden.

This morning I just lay in bed wide awake for like an hour listening to the silence of the house. Thomas had crawled into bed with me at some point last night, and he was having a good dream, I presume. Every once in a while he would start to laugh and almost say something. It was pretty cute. It's times like that that make you just want to keep them a baby forever.

And.......I hate this day!

The snobby business manager harassed my receiver. The parts she received matched the AML 100%. A done deal, nobody is going to question the customer supplied AML. That's our bible. It should be golden. It turned out that the AML is wrong! Then engineer who entered the information goofed up. So, here we are, building defribulators that have an incorrect component on them. Not a good thing!!

So, my receiver came to me in a panic telling me that she has just been chewed out for receiving wrong parts in that match the AML. She's very upset. Naturally, it ticks me right off, I'm already in that mood. I decide to go find my manager and vent a little. She wasn't in her office, so I head into the front office to leave a note in her box to come find me. On my way in, I nearly run into the Director of Operations. He smiles and says 'how's it going?' My perfect opportunity. I smile back and say 'I've had better days'. He stops in mid step and asks me what's going on. So, I tell him. With passion. 'Those receiving girls are under a mountain of pressure already without adding (snobby business manager) to the mix. A part is received in that matches the AML 100% and he is crucifying the receiver because she should have questioned the AML. It is not her job to question the AML, nor is she qualified to.' He replies 'I can understand where (snobby business manager) is coming from though.' I'm still on my soap box at this point. I go on to say 'Whether or not the parts are correct have nothing to do with the receiving process or the person who received them in. He should try spending a day in her chair and see how much he likes it.' At this point, I had pretty much spoke my peace. Director of Operations said 'Let me speak with (snobby business manager). '

He heads back to his office, and I continue to do what I had started in the office to do, and I hear a quiet round of applause behind me. I turn to see the receptionist and executive secretary clapping quietly. They are happy to see that I have stood up for all of us working stiffs out there who get the shaft all the time. Apparently, they heard every last word of our conversation and came out to thank me. I have to admit, I was a little humbled by that. I mean, I only did what I thought was right. My employees look to me to back them up, and damn it, that's what I'm going to do.

Needless to say, not even 10 minutes later, the snobby business manager was back and asked to speak with both the receiver and myself. He was apologizing for coming across in a way that had offended the receiver. It was not his intentions.

point of interest: I feel a tad bit guilty. I have sometimes tended to believe that the director of operations may be attracted to me, based on past behaviors. I know this, and I used it to my advantage today. I knew if I addressed the situation with him, he would get all over the snobby business manager's butt. Which, he did.

Up my Ass

I have one employee who is totally on my shit list right now. I just want to get her the hell out of my sight. And, you know what, she knows this and is totally bugging the hell out of me. She's trying to get back on my good side by being 'extra' helpful, but the only thing that does to me is make me more irritated. I don't particularly want to have her sitting across from me on her break making idle chit chat. I don't need her to tell me to 'smile' because I look frustrated or grumpy. I'm frustrated and grumpy because I'm working, if I were sitting on my porch soaking in the sun, then, I'm sure I'd be smiling. I also don't need her to come ask me every single time she has the smallest miniscule issue what to do. She knows perfectly well when we receive a chemical without MSDS sheets they go to hold.............What the fuck?? Why are you bothering me to ask if it's ok to receive them to hold??

Ok, so now I have a red nose and a chapped ass. What next??

Oh Good Lord!!

I look like Rudolph!! For some ungodly reason my nose is bright red on the very tip. It's not a zit, no raised bump anywhere. AAAGH!!! So far so good, I've been able to conceal the monstrosity.

Jason has decided he wants a new nickname. He has given up stalking. Can anyone help me come up with a cool nickname?? He's an RMA tech where I work. Any idea's would be greatly appreciated.

This would be 'Thomas the Terrible' sitting next to his handy work. (Notice the mangled geraniums??)  

Closet Ditz

Yes, this morning, I totally made an idiot out of myself. We've all had those moments. Open mouth, brain shuts down.

So, here I am, sitting in front of the weird star trek looking speaker phone contraption. The person who set up the meeting has decided to make a page for the rest of the participants to show up. He says to me "Sherri, can you hit the pager for me?" I think to myself, sure, no problem. I dial the numbers, nothing happened. By now, everyone who was in the room is looking at me. The machine tech who is sitting next to me says "You have to turn it on." Don't ask me what possessed me to say such a thing without actually looking for the on/off button, but I say "How do you turn it on?" Duh!! The machine tech reaches over and pushes the huge button marked on/off. I thought I was going to die. So, not knowing what else to do, I just exclaim "You mean that humongous button labeled ON/OFF??" Everyone is now laughing, and Barb comments "That was cute Sherri".

Definitely one of those moments you would like to do over.

And.........Cut! (Director snaps)
Let's do it again, from the top! (Director waving arms for people to get in place.)
Ok..............Action! (The little yellow and black snappy thing slams shut)

Damn those spammers!!

I've been spammed!!

Makes me just want to shove their stupid little 'Nice Blog! Take a look at .........' right under their fingernails. (Can't say throat, they aren't actually verbalizing anything.)

Tales of Torture

Just what you wanted to know........more tales of torture by the makers of women's under clothing.

Today's scenario : White satin shirt that can be a tad bit see through. A definite must, some kind of camisol top underneath. (Goodies shouldn't be on display at the work place.) On a shopping trip not too long ago, I 'thought' I had found the perfect article of clothing to remedy this situation. A one piece deal that would be discreet and seamless at the same time. Worked like a charm.........until I had to use the bathroom. There's just nothing like being nearly naked in a public restroom to add perspective to something.

Note to self, no more one piece deals ever again.

"Time to make the donuts......"

(Dunkin Donuts commercial) That's me today. I just did not want to come back to work!! That's what I get for playing hookey. :)

I did get a nice little pat on the back from the director of operations for Saturday. Yea to me! (ok, ok, just call me Ms. Brown Star.)


Interesting development of the day - I've been working with the new quality tech today for training, and, she's very sharp. I'm sure that's why the receivers are being so nasty. They keep bringing up the fact that she has super long fake nails with the shiny decals and stuff and her tattoos. That has nothing to do with her actual abilities. She is smart. And, they are intimidated by it.

This is the store where I today discovered Zachary is no longer a kid. He is now wearing a mens small (shirt size) and men's size 29X30 pants. Ugh, my first born is becoming a man.

Top 10 Best Things About Playing Hookey from Work

1. No meetings, deadlines, or pages.
2. If I don't feel like taking a shower, I don't have too.
3. Watching soaps.
4. Taking a nap whenever you feel like it.
5. I don't need to answer the phone. If it rings, oh well........I'm not supposed to be home anyway. :)
6. Sitting in the sun.
7. I can add to my blog guilt free.
8. Nothing to do and all day to do it.
9. Catching up on my fashion magazines.
10. The secret pleasure of knowing that everyone else is at work, and I'm not. :0

In case you couldn't tell, I played hookey from work today, and thoroughly enjoyed it. I absolutely needed a sanity day............my split personalities were threatening to desert me.

Home At Last

Thank God, I'm finally home. I don't think I could stand one more moment participating in idle chit chat about stupid stuff that I don't give a crap about. (Whew.........now that I've got that off my chest.........)

Buzz stopped in a few minutes ago to ask if I knew how to get in contact with any of Rocky's brothers or sisters. Of course, I don't have a clue. I can't even remember any of their real names. That's the thing about me, everyone has a nick name. After a while, I tend to forget the real name and they just become known as the nick name. Back to the topic though, Buzz had stopped in to let me know that the door to Rocky's house was open and that he didn't see anyone there, and hasn't seen anyone there. (Buzz lives directly across the street.) He was trying to find out if perhaps someone had decided to take care of things, or if the house was being ransacked because it no longer had living ocupants. I wish I could have been more helpful, but the only one that I even remembered was Wendy, and I have no idea what her last name is. So the plan was for him to call the sherrif's department as soon as he got back home. Jeez, that is all such a terrible situation. I still can't believe he is dead.

I hate people

I don't want to hear about how Elizabeth had to go fill up her propane tank. Or how it was 'highway robbery' at the place she did it at. And, I don't really care about how Sally drove on the way to work today. I just want to sit down and get my work done.

Plus, I have to train. I have to sit and baby sit the new woman who I just hired. I hate that especially. I just don't have the patience anymore. All I can think about is all the work I have sitting at my desk waiting for me. And, how far behind I'm getting.

Then there's the new quality tech they hired. She's working in receiving this week to get her feet wet in the whole system. The receiving girls are just plain nasty to her already. The minute she was out of ear shot they complained about no computer skills and her long fake nails. I don't care!!

Elizabeth just won't leave me alone!!! She's standing here right now bugging the heck out of me about someone making a mistake!!! AAAGH!!!

On a similar yet disturbing note - the people hating IT guy winked at me today.

Root Beer schnapps

When I was in the 7th grade Jessica and I had the brilliant idea to drink some of the root beer schnapps that her parents kept in their freezer. I had gone to her house to spend the night and we were patiently awaiting them to leave. Which didn't take long, they were never home. I can still remember the nervous excitement we felt as we took the bottle out of the freezer, set it on the counter, and stared at it for a few moments. Condensation building on the outside of the ice cold bottle. We each took a swig, Jessica spitting hers out in the sink and me swallowing mine right down. Each exclaiming how terrible the stuff was. And, it really was terrible too. We capped the bottle back up, set it back in the freezer, and locked this secret little memory away in the backs of our minds.

Why am I thinking about this this morning, you may be wondering? Last night I discovered that Zach had been drinking my margarita mix that I keep in the fridge. It freaked me out when I first realized it. I didn't quite know what to think. Then I remembered about the root beer schnapps incident.

Being a parent is possibly the hardest responsibility in the world. You never know if your making the right choice, or if your kids are listening, or if your doing a good job. The older they get, the tougher it gets on top of it. I just hope I make it through and live to tell about it. :)

This is me.........3 years ago before I got my hair all cut off. I miss my hair. I'm making this my profile picture to hopefully remind me on the days that I just can't do a thing with my hair why I want to grow my hair back out.  

What bird wouldn't love this bird house?

The Big Cheese

The Director of Operations showed up today. I almost died when I seen him headed to my desk. On a Saturday?? Must be a figment of my imagination. A mirage. Nope, it's really him. He's checking to see if we'll be able to get 50 AI boards out today and he's not confident that the staff that's out there can get it done. (Apparently the manager of that area told them to just do as many as they could today, now I have to scramble to make sure they get done. I'll have to give Mr. Brown Star a talking to Monday.)

Update on the Donut Scandal. All donuts that were bought are totally gone. The vultures have picked the bones clean.

Kill Me Now

I've been out of bed now for an entire hour. You'd think I would be awake.........but I'm still having a hard time keeping conscience thought flowing through my mind.

And I look terrible!! This working at 5:00 in the morning is not for me!!

My eyes open at 4:15. It takes me a full 30 seconds to realize I have 20 minutes to get out of bed and leave my house if I plan to get to work on time. AAAGH!!

Red rimmed eyes and yesterday's hair do refreshed, I'm out the door and on the road heading to work. This totally sucks!!

And disgruntled machine tech just gave me the evil eye on my way down to get a Mt. Dew. I smiled at him and said "That's not a flattering look for you Dave."

The Natives are Restless

As reigning Ms. Saturday, it is one of my duties for tomorrow to obtain the donut order for my public. In doing so, I must have the receptionist call in the order today and pick up petty cash.

My first Royal controversy - whether or not to order bagels as well as donuts. The accounts payable department is giving said receptionist hell for spending petty cash on bagels and donuts. So, I say 'no bagels'.

I hunt down the tech who normally goes out to get the donuts and he gives me holy hell about the fact that there are no bagels. I stand firm. I state 'I told Barb no bagels.' He proceeds to go to the front office and mandate the receptionist order bagels. Poor Barb.

I then see disgruntled tech's manager walk past and I decide to raise awareness of the situation. Peaches (that's his nickname) looks at me in disbelief and shock that such a scandal transpired over a frigging bagel. He takes off to go take care of the disgruntled tech. (After all, we're lucky to even have the donuts approved!) Before he leaves, Peaches asks me to get with the Production Control manager about the accounts payable debacle.

As requested, I stop in at the Production Control Managers office, and explain to him that I intended no slight, but I did not order bagels, and I offended individuals. He throws his arms up in despair and says 'what next. We provide them with donuts, they want bagels. This is just getting out of hand.'

The Stalker

One of my employees keeps an eagle eye on me. It's actually very funny. She's a 73 year old spitfire with white pick perm hair.

Today I'm in the receiving area, talking with the girls about God knows what. Most likely not work related considering I'm having one of those days where you just want to be anywhere in the world but here. I see something move from the corner of my eye. I glance over and see only a stack of boxes.........or so I think. I keep looking in the direction of the boxes and notice a white puff above one of the stacks. It's Elizabeths hair peeking out above the boxes. I can see just her eyes above the box. I literally laugh out loud.

Funny woman!! She knows I've spotted her and walks over to see what's going on. She's smiling now and says 'Someone's gotta keep this one in line'.

My Morning in 10 Seconds

1. Seriously contemplated the rewards of a breast reduction.
2. Kicked the pop machine when it ate my money.
3. Harassed the vending machine guy the minute he entered the building.
4. escalated the paperball war to include rubberbands and post it notes.
5. Contemplated all the devious pranks I'm going to pull on Joe's desk while he's on vacation next week.
6. Asked my entire team if they were interested in doing overtime tomorrow. (Yah, like that's going to happen.)
7. Watched Mr. Brown Star hovering around the Production Control Managers office door.
8. Read the 33 emails that had accumulated in my inbox between 5:30 last night and 7:00 this morning.
9. Deleted 30 of the emails and laughed as I did it. :)
10. Decided to just say f*uck it, and enjoy the day for what it is.

Too Short

Now, I don't complain on here about my physical appearance often, but, this morning, I've just got to gripe.

While getting dressed a few minutes ago, I look at myself in the mirror. I'm staring intently, like I normally do, trying to figure out if I look ok, what should I accessories with, what shoes should I wear. All the while I'm periodically pulling down the front of my top. Something I always do without even realizing it anymore. Why?? Because my shirt always seems too short in the front. Why does it seem to short?? Because I have been well endowed by nature, and I absolutely hate it!! You hear women all the time complaining about their chest size and how they would give their right arm for bigger boobs. Well, I'm here to say, it isn't all it's cracked up to be. (Don't get me wrong, I'm not at porn star measurements or anything, but big enough for it to always be noticed.)

First of all, nothing ever fits right. Shirts seem too short in the front, or too tight in the chest, or if you buy it to fit the chest area it's too big everywhere else. Plus, men stare. Try working in a predominantly male environment. It's not cool. And, let's not forget about how self conscious you feel.

Honestly, if given a choice, I would pick average sized breasts anyday.

11 going on 30

"Mom, where's the cell phone??" my 11 year old yells, walking up behind me as I'm reading my email.

"It's in the jeep," I reply. I'm suddenly wondering what in the heck he needs the cell phone for. He heads outside and comes back in with the cell phone.

"You let the battery go dead! I need to use the phone!" He's mad. If I didn't know any better, I would mistake him for a 16 year old girl.

"Plug it in....you know where the charger is," my curiosity has the better of me. I listen in as he makes his phone call. He has called his friend Josh and asks what he is up to. Silence. He then says 'nothing'. (Referring to what he is doing, I presume.) He says ok and hangs up.

"Mom, can I go for a bike ride?" he whispers in my ear. The little bugger, he knows his dad just grounded him from his bike. He went for a 'ride' yesterday and was gone for 9 hours without a phone call or anything. He's playing on my weakness - I don't like to see him upset and sad.

"You know your dad grounded you from your bike. No."

"Why??" he's speaking just a hair louder.

"Because you are grounded."

"Why am I grounded??" he's a little bit louder yet. Still trying to keep it down, doesn't want to get caught manipulating his mother.

"You took off for a bike ride yesterday, 9 hours later, after dark, you showed back up at the house. Until you can act responsibly, no bike riding for you!" I have imitated the 'Soup Nazi' from Seinfeld. He is not laughing, however.

"AAAGH!! That's not fair!! Can I have a can of pop then?!?" He stomps around behind me. I laugh inwardly, sneaky little devil. Trying to slip a can of pop in there now. Like I won't even notice.

Yes Dad.......

The left side dock door in the receiving department would not go down today. Try as I might, I just couldn't get the damn thing to go all the way down. By now, first shift maintenance had already left, and I was scouring the second shift for a manager to notify. I find them chit chatting about who knows what. So, I approach, trying not to but in, and wait for the conversation to end. It doesn't end. Now I'm standing there, impossible to be unnoticed, and yet they continue talking about something stupid that happened during the day when they weren't even at work yet.

In frustration, I look down the isle way and see the Director of Operations coming. He smiled seeing the frustration on my face. So, I blow past them and go right to the Director of Operations and explain the situation. (Actually, I think I said the receiving dock door won't shut all the way, and unless we have theft coverage on the insurance policy, we may want to get it fixed.) He laughs, and asks if I've gotten with the Production Control Manager. I explain no, I didn't because he was in his office with a business manager and planner with the door shut. So, he proceeds to laugh and tell me to barge in. Who cares if his office door is shut. So, of course, my mouth speaks before my brain has time to process rational thought, I say 'easy for you to say. Your his boss!'

By now, we are standing directly in front of the Production Control Managers office, and the door is still shut, and the people were still in there. So I say 'I'll just give him a call. I'm here until 5:00.' Director of Operations starts laughing even harder and makes me interrupt the meeting to tell him that my dock door won't shut. I felt like a total idiot!! I had to do it though. I mean, come on, he's the head cheese, there's nobody else in this building that is higher on the corporate ladder then him. He was totally getting a kick out of it too. The scum! Thank God I still get along really good with him, he was my boss for 2 1/2 years, and in that time I got to know him fairly well. In fact, even though he's really tough and not a real people person, I wish he was still my boss.

Interesting Side Note: Director of Operations did not shave today. He has grey whiskers. Orange red hair, always perfectly styled, and grey whiskers. I'm pretty sure that they were short enough that nobody could see them.

Bring that man the brown star!!

You know him........the guy who hangs out right outside the bosses door waiting to fill him in on every little sordid detail involving every last person you work with. The guy who immediately blames everyone else when he screws up, and goes so far as to 'offer assistance' to others who are tasked to fix his messes. The guy who doesn't have a clue what he's doing but volunteers for every project imaginable. (By the way, being that he is totally clueless, he doesn't actually do any of the work, he just gets the credit for being a part of the team.)

In case you haven't noticed, I hate this guy!! I'm seriously considering bringing a metal brush to work with a big bow on it and leaving it on his desk.

Ha! Ha! Ha! (maniacal laughter) Take that brown noser!

Top 10 Best Commercials

1. The identity theft commercials. (I especially love the man sitting in the chair talking about the boustier that 'lifts and separates'.)
2. The commercial with the 2 guys trying to act cool and lip syncing at the bar. (It's going to bug me all night until I can remember what song they are singing.)
3. The Dasani commercial with the man in the bear suit. (Would you want to drink this water?)
4. Hershey's Kisses commercials. (I just love them all. Must be because I'm a chocolate junkie.)
5. Mt. Dew commercials. (Especially the older ones................like the one with the 2 guys in the golf carts.)
6. Corona commercials. (Mostly because I would give anything to be on those sandy beaches.)
7. The 'Accidents Happen' commercials. (My personal favorite, the one where the old woman drives through the garage door, side swipes the second vehicle, and finally ends up wrapped around a tree.)
8. The credit card 'Priceless' commercials. (Especially love the one with the young kids taking the car trip.)
9. Capitol One commercials. (What's in your wallet??)
10. The snowmobile commercial where the guys stop to take a pee. :) Suddenly their snow mobiles are hijacked by the mooses. (I especially love the fact that they show the guy from behind taking care of business in front of the tree. It cracks me up.)

Guess What!?!

Got my tower in the mail today!! I'm blogging at home again!

Speaking of the new tower.......Jessica, a sincere heart felt thanks goes out to you for helping me!! I am greatly appreciative!! I'm pretty sure I didn't give you a proper thanks like you deserved.

Update

DS has apologized for her outburst in this mornings production manager meeting. I was actually sitting here talking with Joe about what happened, and asking his take on the whole deal. I was surprised to see her come back. I'm glad that she did, though. She was able to explain that she was sick of listening to Jim complain about not having enough people, and he didn't even have his people on overtime. (Which DS, CY, and my people have all been doing overtime for weeks now.) I'm a little curious as to the sudden change of heart though.

Can you believe......

I was just speaking with my boss and she literally reached her hand down the front of her top and pulled a silver heart on a dangly thing out of her bra. Then proceeded to tell me how she felt something like a spider crawling down there and the dangly thing from her bra was what she was feeling.

Ok..........I just want to know one thing. Why do these things always happen to me?? I mean, I wouldn't be reaching down inside my top in front of her. Nor would I start telling my male coworker about how horrible my husband was in bed last night. (By the way, that's exactly what I was confronted with only moments before the 'hand in bra' scenario.) I got to hear all about how Mike's girlfriend was a limp rag. I won't go into any further details, because, I pretty much blocked most of that conversation out of my mind already. Or, at the gas station this morning when the guy at the next pump was expressing his concerns to me about the price of gas. (Actually, he walks over to me, exclaimed that the Saudi's were raping us, slaps his hand on my back, and asks me if I like taking it in the ass!)

Can I go home now??

The minute I got here today I was bombarded with issues. I didn't even get a chance to make it to my desk. Elizabeth stopped my on my way past her work station to talk about a board I put in NCM yesterday. Now, that in itself, pissed me off. First reason, she was double checking my work. She had to verify for herself that the boards weren't acceptable. Second reason, she was unable to actually figure out what the discrepancy was. It was visibly obvious that the break aways were not to print. If she had even looked at the print, she would have seen it. Third reason, she asked one of the receivers why I rejected them. This receiver had absolutely no clue, and told her it was because a hole size was off. She had deducted that from overhearing a partial conversation I had with Dave yesterday. Fourth reason, if she had actually reviewed the text in the NCM that I had created, it would have saved me a 45 minute conversation.

While still discussing my actions from yesterday with Elizabeth, Mary and Audrey show up. Each with an issue of their own. Another 45 minute hassle in the works. Thank God (so I thought) I got to cut out early to head for the production managers meeting. Of course, that ended up terrible as well. Got to listen to Jim C. cry the blues about losing his pack out person to my receiving area and how unfair it was and how the process wasn't followed. So, there I sit, the bad guy. I just wanted to jab his eyes out with my favorite pen. (He is forever teasing me about that stupid pen.) All of their others jump on his band wagon immediately, naturally. I'm not a part of their clique, and never will be. (Thank God - I never wanted to be lumped into their category) Finally, I just told them perhaps if Jeff hadn't told Mark he wasn't even sure he needed to replace Scott this wouldn't have happened. I am consistently faced with not getting all the receipts in day after day and need the help. Now all of a sudden he made the decision that Julie was coming to my area, and Scott was going to yours, and Jeff can't let Scott go. This is where the problems lies, not with me stealing your pack out person. It was a little quiet after that.

Joe broke the silence and suggested we break for Zona's proto meeting. I followed his lead and got up as well. He then joked and said "I suppose it's not the appropriate time to be asking for prep help." I just laughed and walked right out of the room. I tried like hell to look unaffected by the stupid bickering and bullshit games that went on. Inside, however, I was ready to kick Jim's ass.

The Close Walker

I hate it when I'm walking next to someone who is a close walker. You know the guy...... every three steps or so your practically holding hands. I never know what to do. So, I try to inch away only to have him inching in the same direction that I am. It just drives me insane.

Next time, I think I'm going to start furiously scratching my arm closest to him and comment about how I'm pretty sure I'm breaking out in a rash of some sort.

Now that I'm thinking about it, the only thing worse then a close walker is a close talker!! I hate that even more! The entire time I'm talking I'm praying that I don't have dragon breath and wondering why it's so crucial to be 3 inches from my face in conversation. Oh, let's not forget about the occasional spit torpedo. God forbid, I would die if someone hit me in the face with spit.

OMG!!

I just went to reapply lip gloss, and I had a black thing stuck in the corner of my tooth!! How long has that been there and why didn't anyone tell me about it!! UGH!!

The Magnetic Draw of the Wave Machine

Standing at the back of the receiving area with their arms folded and their eyes glued to the maintenance guys. That would describe about 90% of the upper management in this building, right now. I'm sitting here watching the spectacle, and, that's exactly what it is too. 2 guys are unloading a 5600 lb wave machine single handedly with the aid of the truck driver, and all eyes are on them. Talk about nerve wracking.

Since I'm talking about it, let's just see how many people I can see out there. Ok, Director of Operations-Quality Manager- Engineering Director-Production Control Manager- 3 Production Managers-my receiving girls!-2 Engineers-(oh, the fun is starting, I can hear the engineering director yelling)-Material Control Planner-RMA Planner has just arrived to witness the spectacle-(Not a good sign, engineering director just yelled 'oh shit......Woa......oh shit')-just seen another production manager join the group (that makes it unanimous, all the the production managers are now watching)-Can't forget Me :) I've got the birds eye view right from my desk!

What were they thinking..............

I have quite literally worn the single most uncomfortable pair of underwear ever created by man kind. I bought them because they are supposed to be seamless. Seamless? I guess you could call it that..................you can't see the seam when they are up the crack of your butt!! (I know, absolutely the most disgusting thing you didn't want to hear) Lets just hope the guy who I think seen me trying to take care of the wedgie didn't really see me. Yikes!! How embarrassing is that!!

Secret Confession

I am jealous of my friend Sandy. Jealous to the core. Not of the way she looks, or acts, or any material objects.

I'm jealous of how happy she is now. The funny thing is, when she was living with Bob, I wanted so badly for her to be able to be happy. I genuinely felt she deserved someone who would treat her well and be there for her.

When I was leaving for lunch today, it suddenly hit me. The guy who she has just started seeing was here, in the parking lot, semi trailer and all, eating lunch with her. And, I was green with envy.

Shame on me!! I want her to be happy, and then I'm upset that she's happier then me!!

Sounds like a line to me.......

The vacuum cleaner is my mechanical nemesis. Not sure what it is about the thing, but it bests me every time. I'm surprised the thing still runs after what it has put me through. I can't even begin to count the times I've had to completely tear it apart to unwind raveled threads and strings and shoe laces in the past. I've replaced at least 3 belts because of those issues alone. I'll never forget the day it would no longer create suction. Absolutely no air intake at all. So, once again I tore it apart to see what the evil creature had thrown at me this time. What do I find, a tooth brush lodged up in the hose with a hot wheel car right behind it. Or, the time the baby sock flew across the tile directly into the vacuum hose as I was cleaning the dust from the molding. Right before my eyes, almost like the sock was being guided by unseen forces.

So, anyway, on with the story. Last weekend, I'm vacuuming the computer room. Just minding my own business, vacuuming away, and I start to hear a weird sound come from the closet door. I stand for a second, trying to decide if I really want to open the door and see what it is. (Been in that situation before. One day I may just tell the story of the squirrel in the fuse box.) Vacuum still running, I'm still contemplating whether or not to open the door. The smell of burning rubber starts to drift up, and that's when I notice it. The vacuum had somehow picked up the end of a spool of fishing line and was furiously wrapping the fishing line around the brush thing on the vacuum. What I heard in the closet?? The spool spinning like no tomorrow against the door.

It bested me again!! That devious machine from hell!

Oh, Woe is Me

What a horrible week. Again. I tried like heck to have a good week but I just can't get the appropriate spin on it.

Zona is going to be back in about 10 minutes to work on the corrective action that the receiving department got for receiving incorrect components in. My head aches just thinking about it. The parts were received in, placed on boards, visually inspected by our customer engineers (ugh!) and it was found that they were incorrect. Should have had green led's and they don't. The woman who received them feels absolutely horrible, worse now because I informed her of the corrective action. Not in a bad way, I'm never horrible to my people. Just in a matter of fact, this is how it is way. I always end the conversation on a positive note though. Today's conversation, the last thing I told her was 'Mary, you've received over 860 receipts this month, don't let this one incident pull you down. Your an excellent receiver, and stuff happens. Just let me worry about the corrective action.'

After the conversation, I have to say, she felt a lot better. She was still beating herself up over receiving parts in wrong, and that was before I was even notified of the corrective action.

I just hope this weekend gets better.

******************************************************

Update: Mary is in tears. She feels absolutely horrible about the whole ordeal. I just briefed the pilot solution to the corrective action with them, and her eyes are all red and bloodshot. I guess we are our own worst enemy. I'm the one under the microscope, answering a corrective action, and explaining the circumstance that led to us failing in our duty, and I don't feel a bit upset about it at all. I'm pretty sure that Mary is more upset about the problems she has created for me then she is about the actual receipt of the wrong part. I have tried to convince her once again that this stuff happens, and let me worry about the aftermath. That's why I'm here.

Mother-in-Law

My mother-in-law is a saint to most people. Nice, warm, caring, all the saintly stuff. I wish I could see her in the same light as everyone else. To me, she's overbearing, pushy, and just plain treats me poorly at times.

Last night was one of those times. I had an extremely long day at work yesterday. To top it off, I had class from 4:00 to 5:00. By 5:00, I was absolutely pushed beyond my limits. I get home and the phone is ringing. After sitting in front of a phone all day long, the last thing I want to do is talk on the phone when I get home. So, I let it ring. 10 minutes later it starts ringing again. This time I pick it up. It's my mother-in-law. She had dropped Zachary of at the tutors house and was making sure that I was home from work in time to pick him back up. Too bad the conversation didn't end there. By the end, I was crying and in the midst of having an anxiety attack.

She proceeds to start with "now, I don't try interfere with the way my children are raising their children, but............." Apparently Zachary and Charlie had words over something that I had no clue about. I cut her off and told her if she was going to talk to me about my 'negative' household she had to fill me in on what happened. Charlie had told Zach that he needed to feed the dogs and take out the trash, that he hadn't done it when he was supposed to before he left with Grandma. To me, no big deal, to Janet, a negative exchange that was sure to crush his spirit and turn him to a life of substance abuse and crime. I became upset. I spoke up. I told her that she had no idea what my house was like behind closed doors and for her to make a judgment based on one snapshot of time was unfair. By now, I'm in tears. I then went on to ask who was she to make judgment on me anyway?? Considering the stuff that I have to deal with on a day to day basis (and we both knew I was referring to Charlie) she should be thankful that I even stay. She was quiet for a second. I kept going. I said I worked my butt off to provide for this family and do it because I want to, because I want my kids to have a good childhood. I then said (with a note of sarcasm) I could be like my mother. (I know, very low blow.) She apologized, but it was too late. I was very hurt.

It's on it's way

Well, I've gone and done it. I've ordered a tower to replace my totally fried one.

For all of you out there who are as uneducated about computers as I am, I have learned one very important thing. Always use a surge protector for your phone line as well as your electrical inlets. Now, I had one on my electrical inlets. I did not have one on my phone line. I, to be honest, didn't even know something like that exists. I now know otherwise.

Lesson learned the hard way.

OMG!!

Driving to work this morning, radio blaring, singing along, not particularly paying as much attention to the road as I should have been. You know how it is. All of a sudden, a bird drops out of the sky and hits my windshield. I screamed, swerved, didn't know what in the heck was going on. (Thank God I didn't have my kids with me!) I came to a complete stop at the side of the road. Heart beating nearly through my chest, I get out of the jeep and walk back about 10 feet where I see a big brown thing on the side of the road. It's a wild turkey. I nearly had a heart attack. I could feel my heart almost beating out of my chest. An oncoming car stopped to see if everything was alright, and I start to tell him the story. He probably thought I was insane. I appeared sane enough. Yellow polo shirt, khaki skirt, leather sandals. I didn't have any drool hanging from the corner of my mouth or a machete dangling from my side. He just laughed, looked at the feathers on my wiper, and told me to have a good day. If I ever see this guy again, I know the first thing I'm going to wonder is if he's thinking to himself 'oh my God, that's that crazy woman I seen the other day.'

No Self Control

Sheesh!! When it comes to chocolate, I've literally got no control over myself. I have just eaten about 15 hershey's kisses, and I still want more. Yikes!

Makes me think about the time Thomas decided to eat a container of hot fudge. I found him in the kitchen, coated in fudge, arms black from the elbow down. I almost died. To top it off, there sat the dog licking the fudge off his feet. I wouldn't have even known a thing had it not been for his uncontrollable baby laughter.

Lipgloss

I just had the most bazaar conversation. I am totally a lip gloss woman. Always wear it. In fact, my nick name from one of my coworkers is 'lipgloss'. One of these days, I may just explain how that came to be. :o

Elizabeth came to me a little bit ago and asked me what it was about the lipgloss that I particularly liked over lipstick. Now, picture a 4'9 73 year old woman with white pick permed hair and bifocals asking why you prefer lipgloss over lipstick. Surprised, I said I liked it because it doesn't dry out like lipstick does after an hour or two. Your lips don't end up with a color ring around the perimeter and lines where the color has seeped into the cracks and worn off the rest of your lips.

Even more surprising was her response. Based on my reasons for wearing lipgloss, she has decided to try it for herself.

Top Ten Worst Commercials Ever

1. The Skittles bubble gum commercials. (Perhaps it should be a pre-requisite that anyone who partakes in viewing one should first take a hit of acid.)
2. The 'male enhancing' commercials. (Maybe if 'Bob' were a little less psychotic looking.)
3. Burger King commercials.
4. Swaffer's used car commercials. (Anyone who does not live in my local viewing area should count themselves as lucky.)
5. Radio Shack commercials.
6. Ace Hardware commercials. (I just can't stand that big fat guy.)
7. Staples back to school commercials.
8. Denture adhesives. (Do I really need to watch a couple eat corn on the cob?? Gross.)
9. Feminine hygiene products. (Feeling fresh??)
10. Got Milk?

The AI Engineer and John

I had to fail some first article parts today, they didn't meet print specs and the part number was not entirely stamped on the part. So, John came back to conditionally accept 5pcs, AI engineer in tow. I explained the situation, pointed out the discrepancies, and grabbed 5pcs for them to use on the floor. John thanked me, and took off out the door. The AI engineer turned half way out the door, and looked at me for a few seconds, then thanked me like his life depended on it. It was a very odd display, I must say. Not used to having our customer's engineers display such gratitude.


Side Note:

John forgot his red pen back here. Ha Ha Ha Ha (evil meniacle laughter) I shall use it to redline anything I get my hands on. Ha Ha Ha Ha (more evil meniacle laughter)

It's Fried

It's official. I just got word from the computer place. My tower is absolutely fried. Stuff has seeped out onto the mother board. I'm so bummed. He said it was the most catastrophic case of lightning damage he's ever seen.

Getting the Computer Fixed

I dropped the tower off last night to get it fixed. Apparently several other people in my area had the same problem. The guy seemed to think it would be a relatively easy fix. Yea!!

It was actually a pretty interesting scene last night when I dropped it off. Guys can be such goons sometimes. He must of thought I was cute or something because he totally fell apart right before my eyes. He was absolutely tongue tied. He couldn't look me in the eye and speak at the same time. And, I do believe he lost all ability for conjugative thought. I asked him if he would like my phone number so he could call and notify me when the computer was done, and he started to giggle. Yes, you heard it, he giggled. Then his pen wouldn't work. So he literally pushed the pen practically through the paper he was writing on. I asked him if he needed a new pen, I had one in my purse. He said no, he was pretty sure he would remember my number. I then asked him if he wanted my name to go with the number. He giggled again. By now, I was pretty much enjoying the show.

Let's just see if he is able to get in contact with me today. Too funny!

It's Amazing What People Will Tell You

I often sit and wonder what in the heck it is about me that makes people tell me the things they do. Do I appear to have a sympathetic ear? Is it my personality? I don't have a clue. Yet, daily, I have the strangest conversations.

So far today.............

I got to hear about Jason's 30th birthday. He went to Detroit, hired 5$ hookers and got all cracked up. I laughed, it was pretty funny. (It was a joke!) I told him welcome to adulthood, all the fun starts now. We were standing with Mike, who is only 25. I just looked over and told him he would know what we were talking about when he grew up.

So, that led into the story of Mike's dad running over his motorcycle in a drunken stupor. I didn't quite know what to say. I looked at Dave, who had now joined the conversation. I commented that it may be time for Mike to finally leave the nest.

Dave then replies "Don't sweat your pipes Mike". I was like, what in the heck?? But, I didn't even want to know.

It's Official

I have finally found out from a reliable source that Rocky died from a heart attack. It does appear that he may have brought it upon himself by living an unhealthy lifestyle.

Two Nuns

I love this joke.


Two nuns are ordered to paint a room in the convent, and the last
instruction of the Mother Superior is that they must not get a drop of paint
on their habits.
After conferring about this for a while, the two nuns decide to lock the
door of the room, strip off their habits, and paint in the nude. In the
middle of the project, there comes a knock at the door.
"Who is it?" calls one of the nuns.
"The blind man," replies a voice from the other side of the door.
The two nuns look at each other, shrug and, deciding that no harm can come
from letting a blind man into the room, they open the door.
"Nice boobs," says the man, "Where do you want these blinds?


Thanks Jessica, had to post it.

I'm Such a Putz

I can't believe I spelled Jason's name wrong!! I had Jessica create a certificate for Jason on remedial driving skills (because of his 3 accidents in the past 2 weeks) and I gave her the wrong spelling. I'm so bummed. Joe has the can of bondo and everything. It's his birthday today, and, as usual, the heartfelt gifts are overflowing. LOL!

I haven't had a response back from Jessica yet, I'm thinking she's probably really busy or not at work.

Interesting side note:
I once stopped directly in front of Jason while he was rolling about 100mph behind me. (He is in a wheelchair.) Needless to say, I ended up sitting on his lap, and he offered to give me a lift to the cafeteria. I thought I was going to die.

What a Weekend

I am determined to not let this week end up like last week! I definitely need to get my computer fixed........so much stuff happened last weekend and I didn't have access to my blog!

1. My husband's friend Rick left his wife. I was in complete shock. I couldn't believe it. Apparently he was tired of her nagging him all the time about money, and their lack of it. (That's one thing about money, it's the root of all evil.) So, he packed up a few things, grabbed the tent, and started camping out behind Rusty's garage. Rusty offered to let him stay in his trailer, but Rick said he was just fine sleeping out in the tent. (Rusty lives down state and only comes up on the weekends.) Per Rick, he and Krista have just been 'friends' for the past 10 years anyway. Such a weird situation. Just Saturday, I received an invitation in the mail for a candle party that Krista is holding. So, Jessica if your reading, do you feel like going to a candle party on the 13th? :)
2. Got my jeep back, brakes working good, universal joint replaced. It 'shimeys' now when I'm driving down the road. I'm going to have to bring it back to get a front end alignment. Not looking forward to that. This mechanic is very knowledgeable, but he creeps the heck out of me.
3. Thomas (he's so cute!) looked at an older woman at Ponde'gross'a on Sunday and starts yelling "geema! geema!" Then runs over to the woman. I was so embarrassed, I had to run after him to get him back. He thought it was his grandma. The lady laughed so hard. She really got a kick out of it. It reminded me of the time Zach and I were in the gas station and this scraggly old man walked in and got in line behind us. Zach got so excited, he started yelling 'it's Santa mom, it's Santa'.

The Most Idiotic Thing on TV

It's an assault to the brain, the only way I can describe it. That new Skittles bubble gum commercial where the lumberjacks are chewing on the trees. I thought I had seen it all, and then I witnessed trees applauding because they had discovered Skittles gum. OMG!!

Secret Confession

If my jeep were here at work right now, I would leave and just keep driving until I was as far away from here as I could get. I guess it's a good thing it's not here.

9 Year Anniversary

Pete just came back to wish me happy anniversary! (We were both hired on the same day, and went through academy at the same time.) We share the same 9 year anniversary with the company. Our anniversary is actually tomorrow, but the scum is taking the day off. :)

I can't believe I've worked here 9 years already! Joe asked me if I was fourteen when I started. Too funny!! I had a good laugh out of that. To date, I am still the youngest production manager on staff. Although, now that I'm 31, I've crested the 'young' peak. From here, it's all down hill.

A Skittle Story

So, there I am, perched in front of the candy machine at work craving a bag of skittles. Put my money in, hit the buttons, waited for the machine to drop the bag of skittles....................

It didn't fall. It hung precariously from the curly thing in which it was held in place. I exclaim "this dumb machine won't give me my skittles!" I just stand there like a dope. Now what do I do? A voice behind me says to have Pete bounce the machine. Pete hops up from his table, walks over, man handles the machine like it's a tin can, and down drops the bag of skittles.

Applause from a few witnesses behind me. I smile big and thank Pete. He just says "aw, shucks".

UGH!!!!!

I just can't figure it out. If I want to put a picture in the profile portion of my blog, how in the heck do I do it??

My Day in 10 Seconds

1. Woke up late, stiff neck, burned forehead with curling iron.
2. Couldn't find Thomas' sandals. He went to daycare barefoot.
3. 264 packages delivered to receiving. Went to get digital camera to document the sight, digital camera destroyed by a member of engineering. (She dropped it, it is currently being overhauled by one of the machine techs.)
4. Dave tried to tell me that Elizabeth is slipping in her mental capacity. (This coming from a 54 year old man who shaves his legs.)
5. Was notified that my new person will not be starting next week, her former manager has refused to release her. Her former manager has been loaning me people all week!
6. Had Rick H. laughing to the point tears when I requested the GPS to find my people. We're forecasted for a 2 million dollar build plan this month. Haven't seen that in a long time.
7. Spice girl is wearing a leopard print velvet skirt, knee length with slits up both sides. The only thing missing is go-go boots.
8. The bearded woman told me it was so hot back here she wanted to sit next to the wave machine to cool off. (wave machine maintains a 500 degree temp)
9. The red tide has come in.........................need I say more?
10. I've told 5 people now all the specifics of GDB4763-0033. If I have to go through the whole story again, I'm going to cut my tongue out.

Req. for GPS

Attention: Director of Operations

Subject: The Receiving/Inspection Manager is in need of GPS to find her employees. Due to the increased volume of incoming material, she is no longer able pin point the direct location of any one employee. Mountains of boxes, bags, and skids have turned the receiving department into a veritable war zone.

UGH!!!

This day is terrible!!

I just really love the way this looks.

10 Signs that your man is a hick

1. Tan line directly across the center of his forehead.
2. Roadtrip essentials - Ice, beer, coolie cup
3. Work boots and shorts.
4. Complete sentences consisting of just one word. (Hmph......Huh.......Yah.........)
5. Flannel shirts in August??
6. Grass sprouting from the back end of their vehicle.
7. An evening out consists of 3 men standing around in a garage drinking beer.
8. An evening in consists of 3 men sitting in the living room drinking beer.
9. He knows the exact location of the spinner bait he lost in the river the last time he was in (fishing location of your choice), but he can't remember where he put that pesky wedding band.
10. The bottom of every t-shirt he owns is missing.

I hate it when..........

I hate it when people act like assholes! They have been doing road construction on Dickerson for over a month now. For the entire time the corner of Van Tyle and Dickerson has been detoured by orange barrels. So today, on my way home for lunch, I get to the detoured section, drive into the lane that is FOR the direction I'm headed, and proceed to go home. However, some stupid woman in a red truck decided to drive into the wrong lane of the detour. And, get this, she is pissed off at me for following basic traffic laws and the flag man at the beginning of the detour. So, there she sits, waving her arms like a mad woman, like that's going to speed me up any. Being the bratty little b*tch that I am, I slowed down to a crawl and flipped her off on my way past.

"For the health of the team..."

It was finally brought up this morning in the production managers meeting. Everyone was apparently on pins and needles awaiting the results of my posting for a new person. Just as I had assumed, everyone was harshly critical of the reasons why the person who was chosen was chosen. RB the biggest opposition.

In the end, the deciding factor ended up being the health of the team. In one scenario, the team would literally be torn apart with animosity. How is it ever acceptable to place 2 individuals with that kind of a past together in a work place. You are literally asking for confrontation. (Best friends at one point, husband of one cheats with best friend......divorce occurs for both...........husband is now engaged to best friend) This is the exact reason, however, that RB is opposed to the choice. He is of the belief that personal conflict should make no difference in the work place. Thought like that is probably the reason why he is no longer a manager of people.

Thankfully, for me, I ended up not being the one who had to ultimately make the choice or notify the applicants of the decision made. The powers that be (production control manager/HR/director of operations) actually made the choice. My boss did the notifications. Definitely a tough situation.

What a day!!

It was a long day today, to say the least.

First things first. I have to talk about how swamped the receiving area was. It was bad. Poor little Elizabeth walked behind a pile of boxes and I lost her. She could have been gone for hours, had I not spotted the grey pick perm moving behind the fed ex packages. (One of the hazards of being a 73 year old 4'9" ball of fire) I had to borrow 2 people from the floor, and we still didn't get everything opened today.

The paper ball war has taken a surprising twist. Joe hit me in the forehead this morning while I was having a team meeting! I have vowed to get even. I'm considering silly string. That could be very interesting.

Speaking of Joe, he totally took the heat for the receiving area this morning. We had nowhere to put the 7 skids of packaging material that came in Friday, so I told Audrey to put them in the Kodiak cell until this morning. Pat seen them before we had a chance to move them. Poor Joe!! He came to let me know that Pat said, in no uncertain terms "nothing is to be put in the Kodiak cell unless it belongs to the Kodiak cell." I felt terrible, he said he told Pat that we let him know on Friday that he needed to get it down to shipping (which we did) but he didn't have room for it down there. When Joe first came to days in January, I would have never guessed he would be one of my biggest allies.

Oh, I won a spatula set at the company picnic!! I didn't even know it. The executive secretary brought it back to me today. Look at me, all excited about a box of cutlery. The thing is, I never win anything, ever. Maybe I should head to the casino. :)

So Hot

It's so hot in here I just want to die.

Makes me think of that saying............'and the people in hell want ice water; but, it just isn't going to happen.'

The Animal Attraction of the Red Neck Tan Line

The deep red of the face and arms, the contrasting bright white of the rest of the body from the neck down. I can barely pull my eyes away. Drawn to the veritable line where white meets red on the neckline of the redneck. A perfect 'V' on the front of his chest.

LOL!!

Seriously, one of my coworkers has got a definite redneck tan going on. I teased him about it earlier, and he has ensured me that he will spend more time sunning himself in his speedo. LOL!!